Sleepless

Beep.
Beep.
Beep.
I turn over and look at my alarm clock with its bright display flashing 6:45. I had been lying in my bed staring at the ceiling for 8 hours. It just hits me how rough today’s going to be. It’s been about 2 years since I’ve pulled an all-nighter and I’m sure I was drunk by this time. Lately things about me have changed. I just don’t feel anything. I’m not excited when I see my friends. And lately sleeping has been harder to do. I wonder if it’s time for me to see a doctor. It’s been 1 month since my brother died. Jacob was so important to me. As I walk over to my mirror I see how different I look. I’ve lost at least 10 pounds and my hair has been looking very thin. I just have no drive to try I just don’t care.
“Mara wake up its time for school!”
My mother’s voice irritates me more and more lately. I dread seeing her in the morning. She got over Jacob so easily. Things are always so easy for her. Of course when we found out Jacob was sick my mother was so understanding. She was so sad such a thing could ever happen to our family. Our perfect little family. Yeah right. She doesn’t get the affect reality has on you. She’s this perfect wife living in her perfect house with her perfect family. She doesn’t have a reality; she replaced reality with fantasy 5 years ago.