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Printed from https://shop.writing.com/main/view_item/item_id/2085985-A-Date-With-Mr-Brain
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by Twiga Author IconMail Icon
Rated: ASR · Short Story · Contest Entry · #2085985
Mr. Brain can never catch a break
Mr. Brain was on a date with World Famous Super Villainess Shrieky who had the power to shriek so loudly she could shatter glass and make ears bleed. They were on a Date at Rancid the Most Evil Restaurant in the world that catered specifically to super villains.

Looking at the menu Shrieky said "Hmmm...For an appetizer I think I want the Mermaid Caviar."

"No." Said Mr. Brain "We are both getting the Rancid Raw Meat Platter..."

"What?!" Exclaimed Shrieky

"And to drink we'll both have tar mixed with mud." Said Mr. Brain

"That gross!" Exclaimed Shrieky

"It comes part and parcel with being a villain..." Said Mr. Brain "When we decided to become evil we forsook all things in life that are good...including good food."

"Where in the Evil Manual does it say that?!" Asked Shrieky "I thought being evil means that you hoard all the good things in life for yourself so no one else can have them!"

Mr. Brain scoffed "You can't have your cake and eat it too! If one is to truly be evil then you must never associate with anything that is considered good, good food, good creatures, good things you must always surround yourself with the most evil things in the world to be a true villain...All those...Others...He looked around at the other villains around them eating delicious endangered species meat or perfectly normal birthday cakes that happened to have red and black frosting, "They are not...Pure enough, they want to do evil things yet still have 'nice things' they will never be true villains...Villainy isn't a lifestyle choice...It as Quest for an Ideal to be the Opposite of all the is Good."

"God! You're such a Control Freak Fundamentalist!" Shrieky yelled loud enough for the windows to tremble but not enough for them to break "I'm leaving!" Shrieky said "I regret even agreeing to go on a date with you." And with a toss of her green hair she was off

Meanwhile the Insects who had been planning Mr. Brains Death were speaking underneath the Floorboards

"Is everything ready?" Asked Dan, the Insect who thought up the plan

"Yes." Said Another Insect whose name was Gilbert "As soon as he gets out of his chair the trap will be sprung!"

Mr. Brain got out of his chair and instantly a Suction Tube built in in case of an undercover hero infiltrating, or a Turncoat Villain decided to switch to Team Hero sucked up Mr. Brain and ejected him into Outer Space

Is this the end of Mr. Brain? Heck if I know!
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