{bitem:2092785} HINDSIGHT

I remember standing there, holding Oscar (my Teddy Bear) and staring down that dark and seemingly endless road.

I was afraid, but at the same time I felt drawn to whatever was waiting for me ahead.

Oscar began to panic when he sensed I might actually go, being a good deal more fearful than I and not the least bit curious. (Back then I’d thought of him only as real and not just a stuffed animal.)

The compulsion was building and I knew that if I chose to go I would need to either put Oscar down so he could wait for me in safety, or carry him with me against his will.

All these years later, I still look back with regret for those decisions I made.