A poem about the reality of living with bipolar disorder. |
I've known you for awhile now But failed to catch your name You are there through the sunshine And beside me during the rain When others cried dramatic And condemned me as spoiled It was then that you and I had began to coil Saw each other more often as the time began to fly You were the only one who never asked me why Even in my room I knew you were near Your purpose or motive I realize now just wasn't clear I should have paid attention, now it' s too late I fear But, you were what stopped me when I was on the edge I am great, I am powerful you always would allege They just don't understand, they could never get it You don't owe them a thing, don't give them the benefit Then you showed your true self After building me up so tall Now I see it was only so I would have further to fall While you watched and while you laughed My soul was cleaved in half I know who you are now and I know you by name Even still my friend it is all just the same Only difference is the intensity I now feel When you kick me I can't believe that this pain could be real When you kissed me at first I couldn't help but squeal I want to believe even though I know by now That it is hardly real We are no longer friends, now that you've been exposed You still stay and say that you have no place to go And our relationship to others remains undisclosed I now must keep you at the furthest distance To preserve my existence I do accept now that I require assistance Not on anyone's but my own somber insistence I shake when you call and tremble when you're near For I know to see me is the reason you're here You slap me and push me instilling your hate Beg me to join you promising it's not too late You won't leave me be and I see you more How can I escape when there is not a door? Look at this, look at what you've made You are special, you and them are not the same You know the answer already to any of their questions It would demean you to even, consider their suggestion I am here and will always be In it to win it kid, just you and me But I do not want you, no matter how you try I see you for what you are and I see through the lies You cannot control me I will not succumb I made it this far and will not come/be undone You're wrong there kid, WE came this far I'm sorry but your wrong my friend, we were driving in my car I have you figured out now I understand your method You kick me you beat me until I'm depressive Then encourage me and tempt me it's just a game to ya But I understand now friend, that's called mania You might know this type of ride as a rolling rollercoaster I have the unfortunate intimacy to know That it's name is bipolar |