Odd, abandoned project

This story of strange happenings and stranger circumstance carry with them a responsibility for the intrigued reader. That though doubt and simple flights of fancy may seem to present themselves to you, the unnatural story we all feel we know, and better yet trust, does not reside within these pages. I might begin by saying something along the lines of, "you are about to embark on a journey of great wonder and even greater significance," but I'm afraid that simply isn't the truth. This will be a story of such seeming randomness that the word, "random," will scarcely help you cope with the sheer haphazard series of events, about to unfold upon these very pages you hold wearily in your hands. And wearily you should hold them. It is at this point I feel inclined to forewarn the reader, that the following content may spark in those few able minded enough, or too weak minded, a mild degree of... insanity. The often-unnoticed subconscious tendencies of peering behind your shoulder can become quite vexing, so it's best not to try and spot the unseen observer, beyond of course the reasons later stipulated in this book. You might also become aware, perhaps, of the unnaturally strong urge to whistle, whenever someone mentions anything about any verity of native avian species, specific to that of East Africa. I'm still working on that one myself, but I find the urge often passes if you think strongly enough about cats. This is your narrator, Gordon Zany, and I hope you enjoy, and survive, the following story.