REMEMBERING DAD

My first memories of Dad, (Tom was my Step-father but was the man who raised me) were when we lived in Alameda, CA near the naval base there. I did not know what he did for a living other than being a “sailor”. I was only seven years old but I remember one thing we did every weekend as a family was to work on a wooden motor boat. Dad applied the coatings of fiberglass and we all sanded it to make it smooth. I mostly remember how the fiberglass made me itch. We finally finished the boat and we went for a ride out on the Bay. I loved the salty spray of the water in my face and the splashing ride as we hit the small waves in the Bay that day. As I enjoyed this and I distinctly remember Dad at the helm, taking us this way and that and purposely hitting waves for the fun of it…amazing because he almost always got “sea-sick” while out on any water so I know he must have taken Dramamine before going out. The irony was that this was the only time we took the boat out because Dad received orders to go to Scotland to serve at a naval base there. We sadly sold the boat…and then one week before we were to leave they changed Dad’s orders and we went to Spain instead.

Dad was stationed in Rota, Spain when I was about nine years old and Mom took my brother, Bob, and I with her to watch Dad during a military parade and medal pinning ceremony (my sister Melanie was not born yet and came along about a year later). It was summer time and Dad was in his “dress whites”. I was awe-struck to watch all these men in their “dress whites” marching before us then standing at attention beside where we were sitting while the medals were given out. Ever since that day I have loved seeing men in Navy uniforms (and other military uniforms for that matter). This was one of my earliest recollections of Dad. I have always thought he looked quite handsome in either his winter “dress blues” or summer “dress whites”. The wonderful thing about Dad is that he was always able to get his uniform on, even this year at 87 years old. I had the privilege to see him in his “dress blues” with all his medals at a VFW memorial service the Saturday before Memorial Day. He filled out his uniform perfectly. It thrilled my heart to see him in his “dress blues” that day.

I am not sure how it works in your family, for families have different practices regarding adult children living with their parents but in our family, whenever we were out of work or between jobs we could go back home and live for a few months until we got a new job. I remember one of those times where I was staying with Mom and Dad while looking for work and one thing that impressed me was I would awake to the smell of coffee brewing around 5 am. I am not a coffee drinker but I sure love the smell. I would look out from the room I stayed in and could see Dad at his desk reading, studying, making notes and drinking his coffee. He was reading and studying his Bible every morning. I loved seeing him do this and as he did I saw changes in his life, the way he worked with others, and worked with the family. I saw him growing in the Lord and becoming very familiar with the Word of God, so much so he could quote chapter and verse of something he read that would speak into the situation you shared with him. Earlier this year he asked me if I would like to have his notes. Awesome! I now have all his spiral notebooks of his studies and comments of the word. I essentially have a commentary written by my Dad. Is it any wonder that I love the smell of coffee to this day?

Dad’s “forte” was his ability to cook for large groups of people. This is what he did as a sailor in the navy, but it was not the only thing he did. He shared this story with me which amuses me to this day. During the Vietnam conflict Dad served on a destroyer. Most sailors had two jobs on destroyers. Dad and a mate of his worked in the “mess” (kitchen/eating hall) and they also shared duty on, as Dad put it, the “big guns”. He and his mate had just put 12 hours duty on the big guns and headed for their bunks to get some much needed rest before their next shift in the “mess” serving breakfast. Since it was evening the lighting in the room with their bunks was set low for people to sleep. They sacked out and started sleeping soundly for a while. Finally Dad awoke to see the lights on in the bunk room and no one in their bunks. “Oh no, we’ve overslept! We've missed getting breakfast ready!” He quickly woke his mate and they hastily dressed and headed for the mess. When they got there it was all dark and no one was around. That is when his mate noticed that it was only 10 pm. I asked Dad what his mate had to say and he told me he said, “a few choice words,” as they headed back to their bunks. Everyone in the bunk room had headed to a movie being shown in the Rec. Room and someone had left the bunk room lights on.

Even after serving 22 years in the Navy Dad kept serving and giving in everything he did. I often watched him do large fundraising dinners for the Round Mountain/Montgomery Creek Community Hall, the VFW post he belonged to, the Up Country Seniors, his Church, and whoever had a need. I know he will be sorely missed. I miss him deeply, that is for sure.