Rance at the Windmills

CHAPTER VIII.
OF THE GOOD FORTUNE WHICH THE VALIANT RANCE HAD IN THE TERRIBLE AND UNDREAMT-OF ADVENTURE OF THE WINDMILLS (OMITTING OTHER OCCURRENCES WORTHY TO BE FITLY RECORDED)

At this point they came in sight of thirty forty windmills that there are on plain, and as soon as Rance saw them he said to his slave, "Fortune is arranging matters for us better than we could have shaped our desires ourselves, for look there, slave Sill Plain, where thirty or more beauteous giantesses present themselves, all of whom I mean to engage in intercourse and deflower, and with whose undergarments we shall cover the land; for this is righteous, and it is the world's good service to sweep so pure a breed from off their feet."

"What giantesses?" said Sill Plain.

"Those thou seest there," answered her master, "with the ample bosoms, and some have them sticking nearly a league out."

"Look, your worship," said Sill; "what we see there are not giantesses but windmills, and what seem to be their breasts are the gears that turned by the wind make the millstone go."

"It is easy to see," replied Rance, "that thou art not used to this business of adventures; those are giantesses; and if thou art prudish, away with thee out of this and betake thyself to prayer while I engage them in fierce and unequal fucking."

So saying, he unsheathed his Hyper Weapon, heedless of the cries his slave Sill sent after him, warning him that most certainly they were windmills and not giantesses he was going to rape. He, however, was so positive they were giantesses that he neither heard the cries of Sill, nor perceived, near as he was, what they were, but made at them shouting, "Fly not, shy and fair beings, for a single fighter mounts you."

A slight breeze at this moment sprang up, and the great sails began to move, seeing which Rance exclaimed, "Though ye flourish greater legs than the Gal Monster Kaminagahime, ye have to reckon with me."

So saying, and commending himself with all his heart to his ladies, imploring them to support him in such a delight, with Hyper Weapon standing and uncovered by his pants, he charged at fullest gallop and jumped upon the first mill that stood in front of him; but as he drove the tip into the sail the wind whirled it round with such force that it shivered the lance to a toothpick, sweeping with it the would-be rider, who went rolling over on the plain, in a sorry condition. Sill hastened to his assistance as fast as her ass could go, and when she came up found him unable to move, with such a shock had his libido fallen with him.

"God bless me!" said Sill, "did I not tell your worship to mind what you were about, for they were only windmills? and no one could have made any mistake about it but one who had something of the same kind in his head."

"Hush, stupid Sill," replied Rance, "the fortunes of fucking more than any other are liable to frequent fluctuations; and moreover I think, and it is the truth, that that same sage Shizuka with the study and books, has turned these giantesses into mills in order to rob me of the glory of conquering them, such is the enmity she bears me; but in the end her wicked arts will avail but little against my Hyper Weapon."

"God order it as he may," said Sill Plain, and helping him to rise got him up again on the road, nearly throwing her shoulder out; and then, discussing the late adventure, they followed the road to Helman, for there, said Rance, they could not fail to find girls in abundance and variety, as it was a great thoroughfare. For all that, he was much grieved at the loss of his erection.

Don Quixote de la Mancha written by Miguel de Cervantes and translated by John Ormsby - http://www.gutenberg.org/cache/epub/996/pg996.html . I just changed a few words here and theme.
Rance, Sill Plain, Masou Shizuka, Helman, and Gal Monsters including but not limited to Kaminagahime belong to AliceSoft.