Saul Bites People

I had a sweet easy-going life, until Saul (my by-then a year-long flatmate) returned from his weekly Friday night's celebration of bars and clubs, and found me on the floor, a bullet sized hole in my forehead and a whole bunch of blood all around me.

I was on a carpet, and the amount of blood was large enough that we had to later throw the old thing away. Of course, I wasn't myself at that moment, so I can only describe what Saul later described to me (with a grin, mind you) about the situation I was in.

Dead, oh so dead.

But as it was, that hadn't sat well with Saul. So he fed me his blood, and what do you know, I popped right back to living. And I only had this feeling that something was off, and a pain at the spot of the bullet hole.

Having completed a rebirth, but guessing at having had had too much of the old drink, I pushed myself up on my hands. They were wet with blood - so pretty gross. First I thought I might have thrown up, or, god forbid, sprayed some other liquids ( which I promise has never happened to me, no matter how overloaded the night was ). But you know, it was that smell we've all whiffed at one point - and being a new vampire it was even more present: the smell of blood and the stickiness as well. Let's say I didn't need to lift my boney fingers any higher than my chin to know what i was laying in.

I could have gone the way of a shock, because of it, but how could I when Saul was sitting on the sofa just three feet from me, having that smile on his face that said he knew something I did not.

And, as was usual to to our tomfoolery, he didn't keep me waiting in suspense, but launched right into it; starting with him finding me on the floor and then rushing into you're a vampire now thingy.

Of course, I didn't buy it at first (no one would), but he was all adamant and it makes perfect sense about it. At one point he handed me a mirror, on which I could see the bullet wound that was just in the middle of healing in a supernatural speed, and those fangs, I had those too.

And again, I could have freaked out about it, but Saul just laughed it off, telling me that it's not that big of a deal. He had me wash my face, and as enough time had passed that the wound was almost healed, he threw me my old man's jacket (that's what he called it) and we headed back out, trying to get a drink in us before the morning arrived.

We ended up at our favorite watering hole. The flashy place was usually packed with all sorts of fun and beauty, but given the later hours, all that remained was just us (the two vampires) and the few torn looking men and women yet to get lucky.

Saul ordered us both a whiskey (joking it to be the drink for vampires) and sat us down away from the speakers that did hurt my sore ears. We put the drink into us without a clink, and then I let the waterfall of questions pour out of me. I started with the nondescript "So, I'm a vampire?"

"Yes, obviously," Saul responded, rolling his eyes at me, and then moving them to wink at a dead-drunk girl sitting at the bar. That's Saul for you.

"And what does that mean?"

I got his attention back, but he looked like he was already tired of the questions as if I should have already had it all together. Rather annoying it was, but he was like that before I knew him to be a vampire.

"What does anything mean? It's just stuff that happens, you were a human, now you a vamp. That's life."

"Okay." I shook my head in disbelief of his tone. "But I think I need a bit more."

He then got closer, forgetting about the drunk lady and giving me his attention.

"Well, most of the stuff you already know from movies and books and stuff. You died, were reborn, and need blood to sustain you. Pretty much immortal."

"But not all the way?"

Saul shrugged his shoulders uncomfortably like he wasn't sure or didn't want to say.

"Not really yes..."

"You mean like a stake to the heart and I'm out?"

Now his head shook firmly.

"No, none of that crap... Well, I mean, a stake could kill you, or a sword or a bullet, but only when you haven't fed for a while. And I guess, some vamps could probably rip your head off or something... But that hardly ever happens." He smiled, (maybe) joking.

"How many are there then?"

"Not sure, not too many, the numbers are kept under control."

"By who?"

"The government or whatever, not human, vampire."

"Vampire government?"

"Yeah, not a fun bunch mind you. That reminds me, you're gonna have to come with me tomorrow, I have to register that I turned you."

"What?"

"Yeah, those are the rules, and it's probably good if you get your documents so to speak in order, I mean you don't have to, but otherwise the law won't affect you."

My head started to get heavy at that point.

"What law?"

"That other vamps can't kill you. Like the human law for humans, this one's only for vamps."

"Okay." I was feeling rather overwhelmed. The idea of vampire life is very similar to human one was perhaps the biggest shock of the day.

"So, you can't kill me then?"

"Hey!" Saul parted his hands, pretending to be offended. "I just brought you back and you start throwing claims like that. How about a thank you?"

"Thank you. Why did you, by the way, bring me back?"

"Well, you're my bud, I needed someone to drink with."

Reminded of the drink, I signaled the waiter for another two.


"What about your vampire friends?" I asked after the whiskeys had arrived.

The question made him look shaky and uncomfortable.

"They can be pretty hard to get along with..." He placed the glass down, "This you should know! Vampires aren't like people. I mean, I could get along with you, but most aren't really interested in that. They think of themselves more like predators, which we are. There's no point in sugarcoding that. You will sense it soon, that humans are kind of okay, but vamps are better, you're going to feel a much stronger connection to your kind."

That made me chuckle, for some reason.

"Okay... But the feeding thing?"

"Yeah, yeah... It is true that you will need blood, and, though I'm sure you wouldn't want to do this at the moment, you are going to start killing humans. But it gets easier with time, every day you're a bit more vamp and a bit further away from humans. It'll happen naturally. Though, a fair warning, best to stay away from those who enjoy killing a bit too much, that is always trouble."

"Okay, if you say so."

"Other things." He continued with an exhausted sigh. " Mind control, it's real, I can teach you. They are going to go over it at the embassy, but you might as well know that you can't go overboard with it. The government has it all set up, so you can't go screwing around, like, I don't know, make a president start a nuclear war, or stuff like that, that will end very badly for you. And, as I said, vamps won't be allowed to kill you, so you can't kill them either." Saul sighed, looking both ways. "And currently, we have a no-aggression pact with the witches, so they are off limits too."

"Witches?"

"Yes." He got closer, his nose just two inches from mine." You do not want to mess with the witches," He shook his head dramatically. "Never mess with the witches." He let his body fall back. "Vamp life is great, way more positive than how they show it in the movies, but witches, they are the other way, very dark, very dangerous."

I think I got a stream of cold running through my spine at that point, and my voice got shakier.

"But how do I know, who's a witch, who's a vampire.."

"Well, vamps you'll sense, the closer the stronger. As I'm the one who brought you back, you'll be soon able to sense if I'm in the city or not, as well you can sense the vamp who turned me better. But let's just say, if you're close enough to fight, you're close enough to sense any vamp. Witches, can't sense them, but they sense you, and, as the alliance calls for, it's up to them to make sure you won't eat them. If they want to, they will get away."

I sighed again.

"Okay. Vampires, witches, how about werewolves, they real too?"

"Kind of, they used to be around, like a century ago, back when we were at war with the witches. I wasn't around myself of course, but I've heard about it. Basically, at one point, witches didn't want to go fight their battles themselves, you know, risk their lives, so they started to poison humans - make it so that when vamp fed he died. But as that wasn't enough, at one point the went all out and turned those humans into animals who would hunt us. But they aren't around anymore. Per the treaty, all were destroyed. Just vamps and witches now. And with any luck, you won't see any of witches."

We then finished our whiskeys (and some more) and made our way back to our apartment. Only when seeing that blood red carpet did it dawn on Saul to ask the question stupidly forgotten.

"Who killed you by the way?"

I could only shrug my shoulders.

"Don 't know, the last thing I remember is opening the door, all blank after that. Is that a vamp thing?"

Saul chuckled.

"No, that's a booze thing, it'll come to you. Either way, I'm going to bed, you should sleep too, much bureaucracy waiting for us tomorrow."

I just smiled, drank a cup of water and went to bed as well. In there, I couldn't help but wonder who would have wanted me dead, and if my miraculous rebirth would make them want to try again.


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