The Ball

I was downtown sitting on a bench, just watching the people pass by. It was a warm April morning and I was glad to get out of the house for a while.
Things hadn’t been going too well at home lately. My on again off again relationship with my girlfriend was off again and there were some hefty cutbacks at work, I just prayed that I wasn’t one of them. So instead of being at home alone, I decided to go downtown and just try to unwind a little. I looked up and saw this woman heading in my direction. She wasn’t much to look at, mousy even. In her hands she carried a brown paper bag. At first I thought she was going to sit on the bench beside me, but she didn’t. Instead, she looked at me with a sad look on her face. She turned her gaze to the bag she was holding, looked at me again. “ I believe this is yours.” she said, and thrust the bag into my hands. She gave me one last look and walked away without looking back.
I looked at the bag in my hands, then to her retreating back then back to the bag again. “What the hell?” I thought. Whatever was in the bag was kind of heavy and felt a little warm to the touch. That might have been because of the April sun shining on it, but somehow I didn’t think so. For some strange reason, I couldn’t bring myself to open it right then so I decide to go home and look at it there. All the way home I had a strange feeling the somehow my life was fixing to change...dramatically. I couldn’t explain that feeling but it was there just the same.

Once I got home, I set the bag on the kitchen table and went to the fridge for a beer. I sat at the table and stared at the bag wondering why it scared me like it did. I mean, it was just a normal brown paper bag that people use for lunches, right? Yeah...right. Then why did looking at it make the hairs on the back of my neck stand up? There was something so not right about it. I stood up, grabbed my beer and headed for the living room to watch a little TV. You know, to take my mind off that damned bag. I lasted about fifteen minutes before I found myself in front of the bag again. “What a big wuss you are! Just open the damned thing already!” I shouted at myself. I went and fixed myself a stiff drink, sat back down and reached for the bag.

The bag was still warm to the touch, which was odd because it was quite cool in my apartment. I pulled the bag toward me and nervously reached my hand inside. To my surprise, it felt like a big ball. A big glass ball. A very...warm glass ball. Very gently I removed it from the bag and when I did, I felt something else in there. It was a wooden base with ornate carvings all around the sides. I took both items out and put the ball on the base. “It’s a crystal ball” I thought. “A genuine crystal ball.” At least it looked like the real deal although I can’t say that I’m an expert or anything. To be honest, I was kind of disappointed. I don’t know what I was expecting, but it was certainly not that. Now what was I supposed to do with it?

I took a towel out of the cabinet to polish it up a bit (I know-that’s for magic lamps-but it couldn’t hurt, right?)
Anyway, I polished it up and guess what happened?? That’s right--nothing at all. So, I did what anyone else would do in my position, I went to bed. It had been a long day and I was beat. I figured it would help to be better rested before I tackled the problem of the ball.
Sleep was a long time in coming, and once I did go to sleep, I was plagued with nightmares. Horrible visions of evil genies, vicious witches and vindictive sorcerers. Where was all this coming from? Maybe I watched too many strange movies. But then, I heard a beautiful voice calling my name. In my dream, I looked all around but couldn’t find the source.

I sat up and rubbed my eyes, shaking my head to get the cobwebs out. “What a dream” I said out loud. Then I realized that I was still hearing the mysterious voice calling my name. I went to the bathroom and then started searching for the voice. The closer I got to the kitchen the louder the voice became. As I rounded the corner I noticed a bright blue light emanating from the kitchen. There, in the middle of the table where I’d left it was the mysterious ball. The whole kitchen was bathed in this blue light and the voice was starting to sound...familiar. I pulled up a chair and peered into the ball. Imagine my surprise when I saw my girlfriend inside the ball tied to a chair. "Kristie? What are you doing in there? I asked stupidly. I mean this isn't the sort of thing that happens everyday, right? It’s not something you can plan a response for. Her head came up at the sound of my voice and she looked around frantically. It was obvious that she couldn’t see me . “Marty help me! Get me out of here!” I’m not gonna lie, I was scared to death at this point. Being the suave guy that I am, I said “OK baby, but uh how did you get in there to begin with? I mean, I’m not sure I…” “DON’T give me that shit Marty! Just get. me. OUT!” she screamed at me.

Suddenly the light started to change color, from a pleasant blue to a glaring bright red. The image in the ball changed, too. It went from being my tied up girlfriend to my psychotic ex-wife. “Margaret? What are you doing in
there? What’s going on? How is this even happening?” She laughed at me. “ I told you I wasn’t through with you. We still have some unfinished business to attend to.” “What the hell are you talking about?” I asked, frustration making my voice rise. “DON’T you raise your voice to me!” she screeched. “I’m in charge here, and you better realize that before your little girlfriend gets hurt.” I put up my hands in a gesture of surrender. “OK Margaret, OK. Just take it easy. What is it that you want?”
“I want the alimony that you owe me.”
“Alimony?”
“Yes, alimony. You know that little thing you have to pay your ex after a divorce?”
“I know what alimony is Margaret. I just don’t know how you think that I owe you any.”
Her face grew red and her voice went up another couple of octaves, if that was even possible. “WHAT?? Are you going to deny that we were married? That’s pretty low even for you Marty!” I ignored that little jab and took a deep breath.
“No I don’t deny it Margaret, but what you’ve forgotten is that the marriage was annulled. You tricked me into thinking you were pregnant and when I found out you weren’t we got the marriage annulled. I don’t OWE you any alimony. Now let Kristie go and let’s forget all this foolishness.”
Margaret bit down on her lower lip, something she always did when she was unsure about something. “Are you sure?”
“Yes, I’m sure.”
“You’re not just saying that so I’ll let her go?”
“No Margaret, I’m not just saying that.”
She paced back and forth inside the ball for a minute or two then she stopped and faced me again. “Well, I’m really sorry to hear that, Marty. However, I can’t just ‘let her go’, I still have to have some money or Raul won’t let either of us go.”

“Who the hell is Raul!?” I shouted. This whole situation was getting more bizarre by the minute. I was ready to pick up the ball and throw it against the wall but I figured that would have dire consequences so I took a deep breath
and asked again more calmly, “Who is Raul?”
“Raul is the gypsy guy I met in the bar the other night. I told him all about how you screwed me over and he said that he knew some magic that could help me but that it would cost me. ‘No problem’ I told him because I figured I would have plenty of money once you paid up. Now you’ve screwed that up for me too!”
She put her hands on her hips and gave me a derisive look like it was all my fault that things had gotten to this point. My head was killing me and I could really use a stiff drink but I had finished off that earlier. Now all I had was beer so went to the refrigerator and took one out. I heard her call out to me but I ignored her for a minute as I rolled the cold can across my forehead. After a few gulps of air and more gulps of beer, I returned to the ball.

“Alright Margaret” I said, feeling a little more calm now. “Tell me exactly what happened.”
“I told you already! I went to this bar and Raul saw me, bought me a few drinks and I told him what an ASS you are. He said he would help but I had to go to his gypsy camp where he would perform the ritual. Then, when it was done, I had to pay him a certain amount of money.” She was almost in tears now which didn’t really mean anything to me, she would cry if she got a hangnail, but then she started chewing on her bottom lip again and pulling on her hair. That was when I got worried. Those two actions together meant she was honestly upset and that scared me because Margaret never got upset about anything.

“You’re not understanding, Marty” she cried, tears streaming down her face, “if I don’t give him some money, I can’t get out of this damned ball either!”
Well, there it was. The whole crazy story right out in the middle of the floor waiting for me to trip over the answer. So, I did what anyone would do in situations like this- I went and got myself another beer. As I drank my beer and listened to Kristie and Margaret crying in the kitchen, I tried to think about my options. Well, that’s not entirely true. The fact was, I had no options. I had to find out how much money this guy wanted and then figure out how to get it. I went back to the ball. “How much money did you tell this guy you were going give him?” Margaret looked at me with such hope on her tear-stained face I almost felt sorry for her. Almost.

“I wasn’t sure how much you would actually cough up so I told him $5,000.”
I took a deep breath. That was going to take a big chunk out of my savings but it was something I could do. “Alright, what do I have to do?” She gave me a bank account number to transfer the money to and told me that as soon as Raul had proof of the transaction they would be released. I did as instructed then sat down with another beer and waited. After about twenty minutes the room began to get brighter. It was like the sun was in my kitchen there was so much light. I covered up my eyes for a few minutes and all of a sudden the light was gone. I dropped my hands and there in the kitchen were Kristie and Margaret looking like they had just come by to visit. I don’t know what I expected but I really wasn’t expecting Kristie to walk over and slap me soundly across my face. My hand flew up to the spot she had hit and a surprised look was in my eyes. Kristie screamed at me. “I never want to see you again, Marty! Don’t try to contact me at all! If I never see you again, it will be too soon!” She stormed out of the kitchen and slammed the front door on the way out. I guess that means we’re off again in our relationship permanently now.

“That went well,” Margaret said with a smile on her face. I turned to face her and pointed my finger at her. “You’re going to pay me back every penny of that money.” She put her head back and laughed until she ran out of breath. Still gasping for air, she took a step toward me and patted me on my cheek. “You know me better than that. I’m not paying you a dime.”
“I’ll take you to court and sue the pants off of you,” I shouted at her, barely concealing my anger. She laughed again and shook her head. “Marty, Marty, Marty. Who are you going to tell? Who would believe such an outlandish tale?”

I would have given anything at that moment to put her back in that damned ball because I knew she was right. There was no way in hell anyone would believe me. “Fine” I spit at her. “Don’t let the door hit you in the ass on the way out.”
She chuckled again and ran her finger down my arm. “I’m afraid there is still something you have to do Marty” I raised my hands up as if to ward her off. “Oh no, I’m done! Just take your ball and go. I never want to see you again.”
“I have no problem with that last part," she said," but YOU have to do something with the ball.”
“What are you talking about now? Did being in that ball make crazier than you already were? Because you are totally bent if you think I’m having anything else to do with it.”
“I’m afraid you don’t have any choice in the matter. You see, it was all part of the deal. You pay the money-you dispose of the ball.”
“No, I’m out of it right now.”
“If you don’t get rid of the ball per Raul’s instructions, You will go into the ball...forever.”

I sat down on the chair and ran my fingers through my hair trying to figure out what I could have possibly done to have earned me all of this. Nobody is perfect, especially me, but even I haven’t done anything that bad. “Alright. What exactly do I have to do?” She told me.

The guy was downtown, sitting on a bench just watching the people pass by. He looked up when he saw me approach with a brown paper bag in my hands. Stopping in front of him I looked at him with a sad look on my face. I looked down at the bag I was holding then back up at him. “I believe this is yours” I said and I thrust the bag into his hands. I gave him one last look, turned and walked away without looking back.
The End