When in the course of reindeer events
it becomes necessary for reindeer
to dissolve sleigh-pulling bands
which have connected them
to Santa, and to assume
among the powers of
Earth, the separate
and equal station
to which the laws
of Gnu and Nature’s
Elk entitle us reindeer,
a decent respect to the
opinions of every reindeer
requires that they should say
the causes which spur them to
separation, to wit, to go on strike.
(Santa seeks transportation
from the reindeer scabs extant;
but when he asks Strike Breaker,
Rudolf says to him, ‘You can’t!”
Dasher and Dancer holds signs,’’
as they scowl at Breaker Scab;
Comet and Cupid join ranks—
Santa has to call a cab.)
We hold our reindeer
rights to be self-evident,
that all reindeer are evolved
by selection, that we are given
by nature certain unalienable rights,
that among these are lichen, willow
leaves, reindeer moss and a good
rubdown of our haunches at our
North Pole address…when the
weather permits, of course.
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