When Encountering a Satanic Cult

I arranged my things ever so neatly, making sure my accessories were accounted for. In reasonably good health the staff suggested I see Dr. Kevorkian, “It’s protocol!” Certain forces want to change my DNA. “It’s irrelevant,” trust the process while facing Level 13 sized attacks, Kid Rock's version of Sweet Home Alabama and androgyny on a global scale. This boy is impressive. Met the locals for a good time, which lasted for six consecutive nights and weekends. Yup, nights AND weekends. Expressing oneself can get a target on your back quicker than Herman Caine at the DNC. Made reasonable progress on the piccolo. What did that symbol mean? Can I be a part of this as well? “You’re not exactly the right, uh...lineage.” what was told to me. In the neighborhood preaching loudly from the bus stop passersby cheering and revving their engines. In the beginning I had so much hope, reliant on dreams and auditory hallucinations. My plans dashed. Everybody pays. I should have apologized sooner. This is your reality on drugs. Watch out for poisons in the garlic bread. Always be respectful and polite, you never know when you might need to rely on an undesirable. What are you all planting in that garden? Pungent concoctions brewing in a steel pot. Receiving half eaten food. Use anti- cavity toothpaste, but wait, where’s my toothbrush? Pants got stolen when I went to the store. Daily chores require me to be engaging, robust and viably ignorant. Parking meter destruction solace in the fact that I’m merely passing through. People around me have got problems that I don’t care to address. Field trips with Anton Levy to the grocery store for herbs and spices. Thomas Aquino style tactics right before lights out. Six hours until double scrub. Being watched at night by a homeless fat couple in a stationary sedan. They’re gonna tell on me first thing in the morning. “I really want to get you on that boat.” I bet you. If you succeed, you’ll be the star of the team. Camping excursions in the forest I’d be wise not to attend. Organized crime being gleefully encouraged. Sometimes it pains me to wake up in the morning. What do you mean I can’t leave the facility? Everybody on the goddamn floor when Paul is doing his rituals. Said they’re in the business of saving people from themselves; I don’t buy it. NBA Finals on 3 days in a row. Can I see the remote? Jackie is married to the enemy. When I asked her if I was safe here, she told me yes. Olympic caliber liars. Offering me weed that expires two days after I get it; then scold me as soon as I smoke it. Accuser of the brethren. Scriptures hidden in my sock, emergency morals in a tote box, everybody wants to be my friend. “How tall are you?,” that’s none of your business. People frowning when I light a cigarette. Townsfolk sabotaging the children’s toy section. They pissed all over my work. “You are losing so much weight you must be working out.” Don’t ever talk to me again. Overzealous recruits shaming special interest groups. James Bond style villains plotting my death on six continents. Birthday card read dead, on drugs or in prison, good luck. What about all of the prayers I’ve said? Impeccable indictments on clutter free coffee tables staff promised to help me later. White girl lured me around the back of DD’s Discounts. This isn’t working out. I’m scared is there a church around? Bad Boys 2 is on again it makes me sad. Did somebody unknowingly renounce my vows? What the hell; I don’t get it; just lies and double speak. Last paycheck came I still couldn’t escape. My fate was posted on Next Door.com order a snack using Post Mates with a stolen credit card. A mound of regrets is all I've eaten in days. Make sure your parables are gender fluid and when encountering a Satanic Cult, it’s always better to err on the side of caution.