Triangular-Based Misgivings

I made my points in three different ways. Going in three different directions, or dimensions, could these triangular-based misgivings derive from data? What does this all mean? Darned if I know. To challenge a miscalculation of justice, could I have been misinterpreting my qualifications? How could I have thought that the plot of this whole thing was none other than Rickety Rick Plot Doer? Why would he be documented as none other than Stormy Lisel Make Me Laughable? A little bit of a chuckle to make my day go better. I'm hopeful that you can see my humor the way that I see it.

Little petty things have severe consequences that are a bit extreme, but the majority of people want to penalize people who do minor things. This is one of the triangular-based misgivings that I'm talking about. Trivial little things start as something small, then it turns into a major outburst; someone that wants to get even (putting someone in their place), this is a sure-fire way to make someone pay by locking them up. There are other things that people get by with that need to be locked up.

I wanted to help my mother get improvements done to her home out of the goodness of my heart. I was on a limited income (meaning that I couldn't do much). Even if I could have helped a bit, the state wouldn't allow it. I was between a rock and a hard place. Because I wasn't able to contribute to anything, I felt bad. In my opinion, most people couldn't figure out why I couldn't contribute. I couldn't explain to them why I wasn't able to contribute. Zapped of my energy, due to having a mental illness, I didn't have what it took to maintain a job; I wasn't able to function properly. Trying to explain to people that couldn't understand, was exhausting.

My doctor, who has since retired, wrote a letter saying that I have a lifelong disability. I was diagnosed as having a schizoaffective disorder, which is a form of mental illness. In the past, I've spoken to nurses at the college that was in training, to help them learn about mental illness, and what it was like (what I have gone through), and what experiences I've had because of it. The stigma surrounding mental illness is a major part of having to explain it, especially when it comes to family and friends. I get a lot of comments from people who say that the things that I'm saying are all in my head. They respond by saying that I need to keep myself busy, and it will all go away. The truth is, I've been there and done that, but it still doesn't go away. It has been an ongoing struggle to fight for some kind of normalcy; I never know when the down part of this illness will hit; it happens when I least expect it. Good days can go on for a while, then, out of the blue I get stuck in a rut; I feel down and don't want to go anywhere, or be around people during those times. I want to talk to somebody, but it's hard to reach out to someone when I'm sad; no one wants to hang around me. At other times, it's an issue of trust. Who wants to listen to me? Hearing repeats of the past is difficult to shake; it is evident that no one wants to hear about that. Friends tell me that I just need to get rid of it; this is when I say that this is bull---- because it doesn't happen. It hurts me when I have to tell them that; they don't believe me. I talk about these experiences in a book that I'm trying to get published.

Triangular-Based Misgivings can ruin a person's day. I would like to change the title to A Triangular-Based Uplifting. Compassion and understanding are what I need. The situation continues to get worse when your relatives and friends pass away. Making new friends is not easy. You end up being alone with no one to talk to. Without it being held against me, it's hard to know what to say. Well, I don't need to bore anybody with what seems to be a bunch of nonsense, so I'll end this story for now.


Written by Anna Marie Carlson
Saturday, December 25, 2021