The Cure For Writer's Cramp

"I've found it!" Herman yelled pumping his fist and breaking into a spasm of dance.

"What have you found?" Celia asked as she raised her brows and tried to give Herman her most unamused look.

"The cure!"

"For your ridiculous dance moves?" Andre asked.

"No... smart guy..."

"Well what then?" Celia asked in her huffiest voice.

"For Writer's Cramp!"

"Writer's get a cramp?" Andre asked.

"Of course they do. It's been a plaguing problem for the last 20 years. My aunt suffers from it dreadfully... can't seem to stop herself..."

"I don't think I've met your aunt," Andre said as he pursed his lips, "come to think of it, I didn't think you had any family."

"Oh, yeah. I have my aunt."

"And she has writer's cramp? Is that like a swimmer's cramp?"

"Oh no. It's much worse. It completely immobilizes her. Her hands are locked on her keyboard unable to let her be until she is able to come up with a piece of writing worthy of publication..."

"Isn't that what writer's do?"

"Yeah, isn't that their job? Why would they need a cure from that?"

"Oh yea of little knowledge..." Herman stopped when he noticed Celia's dark look. He cleared his throat and decided to be a little less zealous as he continued, "some writer's can't break free from the cycle of daily submissions. It's an obsession... almost like OCD."

"Obsessive Compulsive Disorder?" Celia sounded less than impressed.

"Exactly."

"And what is the cure... beyond unplugging their computers or shutting down the WiFi?"

"Oh, well... I hadn't thought of that..." Herman mused.

"Herman," Celia called to get Herman's attention.

"Oh, yes, sorry. It's to lure them away with these." He held up a plate of donuts. Each with birthday sprinkles and unlit sparklers poking out of each one.

Celia's eyebrows shot up.

"Donuts?" Andre questioned.

"Yeah, my aunt loves donuts. If I present these - her favourite treat, complete with the sparklers lit, she will leave her computer and come out of the basement."

"And that's a cure?"

"It worked last night and the night before and the one before that..."

"At that rate your aunt will be the size of your house." Andre pointed out.

"Maybe you should just turn off the WiFi." Celia muttered.

"Yeah, I suppose that could work too, but the donuts really are wonderful."

"No we're good. We wouldn't want to deny your aunt."

"No, I guess not. I better go."

As Herman left Celia and Andre exchanged a look, then went back to their respective jobs.

"I think Herman's starting to loose it." Andre said.

"He lost it a long time ago." Celia muttered.

Word Count = 441.

Notes ▼

The Writer's Cramp - birthday week - can I write something for each day of the week?
Due Jan. 24:
After twenty years of research, your main character has found a cure for Writer's Cramp. What is it? How does it work? Side effects? Choose Comedy as one of your genres.