It's been a rocky year, I know I am not the only one. For most we have struggled and scraped by, an done what we have had to. Not most people are going to tell you that they have had a struggle, an what they have had to do cause they don’t want you to see them struggle. For me I know I have not been at the best places an basicly ubered myself to friends and family for some extra cash. Do I like to do that with my busy schedule. Add three boys in that mix, my life as well I know I have spread myself thin. Is that what I need to be doing, probably not but I am doing what I need to do to help out. I do Not like asking my family and friends for help. It's something that is embarrassing in my eyes, for some its easy cause they don’t have to ask that often. But for someone that is struggling to keep there head above water asking so many times. Number one cause in my mind im taken money form my family, Number two I have already asked twice this month. Number three what if I ask and then that person or persons look at you like, I don’t know how to explain it but its a look that makes you feel like you have just dumped your who life at there feet, and your expecting them to pick up your peaces. For me that’s a look I have gotten before, it made me feel 2 centimeters tall. I was trying at that point, I was doing all I could and pushing myself as much as I could, while having a home life, doing for my kids, house work, cooking, picking up after the boys, helping with homework that I have no idea what its about. So thank God for doctor Google cause I never done math homework like that. But my point is, people struggle, an struggling hurts sometimes. It gets better over time, I am not going to say it going to take a day or a week. It could really even take up to 2 months. Don t feel bad about it, you are capable of doing it. Its going to take time and that time is going to feel like it is running and running you. Keep taken deep breaths, cry, scream, yell and throw a two year old tantrum cause if it help, and makes you feel even a percent. One percent better do it, cause your sanity, mental health, your well being is all that matters. You are what keeps you and your family a float, you are the one that help with you and your family, your the back bone, the shoulder to cry on and the warm marshmallow goo that holds everyone together. You are mom, and you are strong, you are everything to your family. |