Dream Journal of a Girl I Can't Forget

|Chapter 01|

Two young men were walking through town, chatting leisurely as they went. Cutting through the nearby park they continued, slowing at a bench and sitting down from a short rest. “So how have things been? Recently you have been looking exhausted. Work being that much of a pain?” One man asked the other who was leaning back, staring up at the sky. “Eh, I wouldn’t really say so, neither here nor there really..”
“Yea? Gotta be something then. Staying up too late?”
“Mmm-something like that I suppose.”
“C’mon man, don’t dodge the question. I’ve known you damn near twenty years now, I can tell when you’re stuck on something.”
The other man let out a brief sigh as he sat up, “It’s nothing important, ever see something out of place or whatever, that you kinda get hung up on thinking ‘what even the heck’ over and over?”
“I think I get what you mean, like when you go grocery shopping and find stuff sitting in aisles they don’t even belong in.”
“Y-yea, sure.. Something like that I guess. I mean, that’s more people being lazy, but close enough.” the man chuckled a little and continued, “Anyway. You could say that my head’s been ‘stuck’ on something like that. Or rather, someone..” The other man smirked, “Ah, a girl I bet? What’s her name? Is she cute?” the man waved the other off, unamused. “No, shut up man. It’s nothing like that. Or well, maybe..but not the way you’re implying. I saw someone, well I didn’t see them exactly.. But I got the strangest sense of deja vu when they were there, I know for a fact I’ve never met them before though.”
“Okay, you lost me bud. How do you meet someone without meeting them? Where’d you see this person in question?”
“In a dream…I think? It felt more like a memory than a dream however, so it’s hard to tell if it’s one or the other. It was a week or so ago anyway so I don’t remember any details about it, it’s kind of just a blur. That feeling is stuck in my head though, like seeing your best friend for the first time in years.”
“That so? Didn’t think you’d have gender-bent dreams about m-ahh” The other man was cut off by a swift punch to the side, “I’m serious man! And why the hell would I have gender-bent fantasies about you? That’s just weird.”
“Sorry, sorry. I couldn’t help myself. That is a little odd though. Maybe your head was trying to process information that night and things got a little mismatched? Has it happened more than once, or in the last couple days?” the man simply shrugged, “I’m not sure, you know how it goes-your mind usually forgets most dreams and such shortly after waking up, not much I can say about it now.”
“Well, maybe you could try writing it down before you forget then? That way if something comes up again you can recall it later.”
“That sounds…really bothersome.”
“Well don’t say I didn’t offer any advice later on, come on let's get goin’.” The two got up and continued their walk.

Two weeks have passed since they had that conversation, though he forgot time and time again, the same bizarre dream happened repeatedly. Once again the two were walking through town, both having just finished work for the day. “Still looking ragged, I see. I hate seeing you have a hard time like this, so I just went and got this for you” tossing a small composition book and pointing at his friend, “take it and write. I know you think it’s probably pointless and a pain. But just try it. Maybe if you take the time to write whatever it is, it might end up not bothering you as much in the end. And if not, so what? Just trash the book and move on.” the other let out a defeated sigh, “alright..sure, sure. I’ll do it. Whatever man.”

--'

February 20, 20XX.
Nothing really happened tonight. Not sure what I’m supposed to write here..

--'

February 22, 20XX.
I don’t remember much, but I think I saw some girl in my dreams last night. Not sure what she looked like or anything, when I try to focus on what’s left in my head it gets even more blurry. I didn’t think it was gonna be this annoying.

---

February 25, 20XX.
I definitely saw her again last night. I don’t know who she really is, name or otherwise, but I’m certain it's the same person. Guess until I figure a name or anything I’ll just put a placeholder in here? [The Girl] should be simple enough for now.

---

March 19, 20XX.
I had this weird dream last night, there was this girl bugging me while I was walking along the beach. Every time I tried to ask her name, she dodged the question. I couldn’t help shaking the feeling that I’d seen her somewhere before, I dunno, probably just a jumbled memory or something.

---

March 22, 20XX.
Nothing all that weird happened last night, I’m guessing it was normal or I simply can’t remember whatever happened. Better nothing than problems.
Writing these is so pointless, not that good at it either.

---

March 27, 20XX.
I’m not sure what was happening, but I was running. Running as though my life depended on it. I kept yelling someone’s name, but every time I tried to recall it I got nothing. I ran down the halls of whatever building I was currently in, turning here and there, throwing doors open. Whomever I was looking for, it felt like they were just right around the corner and I simply needed to move faster. I threw another door open and I was outside, and began running down the sidewalk. There wasn’t anyone around as I continued to sprint.
Turning the street corner, I had just caught sight of someone entering another building, the tail of their hair flowing as they walked through the door. Faster, I thought, I had to move faster. But then my legs felt numb and I couldn’t move any longer, I abruptly collapsed to the ground.
I was staring at my bedroom ceiling. I still had a lingering feeling of loss for not being able to catch whomever I was chasing after.

---

April 2, 20XX.
I was standing in a lustrous garden and felt something prick my chest. It was bothersome and wouldn’t go away. When I looked down it felt as though all my weight was shifting forward with me, and it got stranger from there. Long, black hair draped down past my eyes and hung low over my shoulders. My hair is supposed to be blonde, not black.. At first I didn’t believe what I saw, I apparently had a modest sized set of breasts pressing against my shirt. I guess I was a chick now? I brushed my supposedly now black hair out of the way and looked around. I had never seen this garden before and the surrounding area looked foreign as well. I called out to see if anyone was around and unsurprisingly, a disturbingly feminine voice came from my mouth.
After walking around I still couldn’t find anyone and wanted to just get out of there, trying to will myself awake, to no avail. I just kept walking around for who knows how long, until I woke up this morning. It was certainly strange being a woman..how my mind could even process and simulate it is mind-boggling for sure.

---

April 8, 20XX.
We were laying up on the school roof looking up at the sky. You told me not to give up.. when I looked into your eyes I could see the faces of everyone else gazing back at me, repeating the same words. A sigh escaped me when I saw you standing there in that beautiful, flowing white dress, “you’re not even real..” I doubt that you would ever dare to wear something like that in your wildest dreams, but that’s alright because this all isn’t real anyway. Things got blurry and I can't remember the next part of the dream, as usual, but I recall a bench.. I had a sickeningly lonesome feeling gripping my chest. Then there you are, you're nothing like the real you from my “memories” (I wasn’t sure how I could feel that way though) "Why the hell did you call me here?" Is all I get in response as I sit down. The words hurt and sting as I hear them, "I don't know. I was just here and then you crossed my mind. Maybe it's just some kind of subconscious habit or something." You sat next to me but wouldn't look my way. Even if you won't face me, the nostalgic feeling of being near you puts me at ease just a little bit, even if you're always mad at me here. "So what do you want, since I'm here."
I just want to bask in this moment, with you here, but I know I'll wake if I try to focus on it. "I don't know, you being here-with me-is the only thing that makes me feel like this." A sigh escaped me, "It's certainly odd, having the awareness of being in a dream, and the dream itself knowing it is all in my head."
Looking at me, finally, you roll your eyes, "Do you expect some kind of heartwarming embrace? Is that what you want? You only call me here for stuff like that." You're right. The only time you show up in my head is when I begin to fall apart. "I don't want anything. I don't need anything." It came out autonomously. "Just shut up and come here"

It's morning.. I roll over and look at the clock wondering when I passed out. My chest hurts and my head is fuzzy. Just another day I guess.

---

“So, how have things been? It’s been a bit over two months now, any progress?” The two men were once again sitting on the park bench. “Well..things have certainly been..things.” The man lightly smacked the other’s head, “That’s not much of an answer smart guy. C’mon, talk. You’re looking a little better these days.” The other man pulled out a composition book, “It’s weird, half the time I feel like when I see ‘her’ it’s like I’m talking to my sister or something..”
“ and the other half of the time?”
“..well if I had to put it into words, and I’m not sure how accurate this might be, like she’s talking to me but I’m someone else to her. Almost as if the dream is from someone else’s perspective. Sometimes she seems to loath me, other times like she loves me above all else..”
“hmm.. Care to let me flip through that and see for myself?”
The man hesitantly handed over the book, and the other began reading through it.

|TO BE CONTINUED|