Walmart Return

Word Count 369

         The Walmart greeter was smiling broadly when I pushed my buggy through the door. I know what he was thinking.

“Returns down that way” he said, pointing to his left
.
I knew that, and struggled with my oversized load toward the line at the return center. It was bad enough this oversized thing wouldn’t fit in the buggy, but the buggy itself had a mind of its own.

Finally I reached the counter, the others there took mercy on my plight and let me move to the front.

“I need to return this, it's not what I wanted.”

The look of the clerk should have forewarned me this was not going to be easy. Her eyes wide and holding back a smirk she says,

“Ma'am, that’s not ours. Where did you get it?”

"It knocked on my door this morning with a delivery guy connected to it. Where the heck you think I got it?" I said between clinched teeth.

“I ordered it online and when I called to return it the lady said for me to take to my nearest Walmart for a full refund. So here I am. FIX IT please!”

“I’m not sure, I think I’ll have to call the manager about this.”
Nervously reaching under the counter for the intercom phone.

“This is not what I ordered. I ordered an 8 inch panda doll. Not a 8 foot over stuffed monstrosity as this. Now after fighting it down my stairs, and wrestling it into my Cricket. Nearly getting a ticket but the officer was laughing to hard. And pushing it across a parking lot with a buggy it barely fits on. You're not going to tell you can't take it back, I dare you!"

“Mam, step over to the register at the end of the counter, she’ll refund your money and you have a wonderful day!”

Dragging the 8 foot Panda I moved down to where another clerk was standing and had a look of fear that was barely hidden by a smile more plastic than my credit card.

"ok what seems to be the problem ma' am?"

Looking from the lady to the panda and back to the lady,

"What do you think the problem is, I got a stuffed panda bigger
than you or me. I didn't order this oversized doll, I don't even have kids!"

She rolled her eyes, and fire works started going off in my head, she clicked her tongue a couple times while she keyed open the register and pointed her laser reader at the tag on the Panda. It didn't beep.

She started to say something and I said under my breath,
"Try again or you will find that laser gun somewhere you don't want it!"

Turning white, she tried the laser thing again and it beeped. Da, da it was cleared for a return and my credit card would be debited for the price plus tax.

She finally took care of the issue, having two stock boys pick up the 8 foot Panda and moving back into the stock room.

         She apologized over the issue and curtly bid me a goodbye. Turning away from me I wondered if I should tell her about the 3 babies that were traumatized with me dragging that bear across the parking lot. Naw, let their mothers complain.

Word Count 369