Chipping away at shame

Shame, shame, shame.
Fuck you, Gerald.
You're an asshole and nobody likes you.
I didn't do anything wrong, and you're a dick.
I'm not playing your stupid games anymore
with the runny nose and tightness in the chest.
I am grocery shopping today, not snorting cocaine.
You won't make me feel bad because I want to eat Froot Loops.
I will take the milk from the display extra slow, just for you
and dawdle while I'm in line.
I may even have a look at the celebrity gossip.
What do you think about that?

Then we're gonna go Ice skating, just you and me.
We're going to drive an hour there
so there's too much time invested to turn back.
We're gonna do a few laps in our somatic and mental discomfort
while all of the people (judge and stare) pay no attention and don't care at all.
I'll kick and push while I carry you on my shoulders.
clumsy and stiff at first but picking up speed
and then I'll start to forget about you and my load will lighten and I will glide.
I'll carve the letter S to the rhythm of the music.
S for self-acceptance

After my legs are sore and I have the big monkey-toe cramp
I will get in my car and drive home
and I will be proud of myself and at peace and just a little better than I was before I came
because I did it, the thing I wanted to do.
no thanks to you
I can't wait to go again even though I have to take you with me.

IC/ EXPOSURE THERAPY