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Rated: E · Other · Philosophy · #2333543
What I Was Thinking Seven Years Ago
Looking back through my notebooks, I found this page of free writes from exactly seven years ago. Wanna peek inside my brain for a minute...?


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Aneb shook his head at the white building. Had he really just been put through that? He went inside to apply for one specific job. They looked at him like he was there to blow the place up. Not even good enough to be a janitor?

Aneb had graduated Princeton cum laude. The interviewer had graduated Paducah U. Aneb spoke three languages; Mr. Teague barely had a grasp on English. Aneb had traveled throughout the Middle East, Europe, and much of Southeast Asia. Teague was "born, bred, and corn-fed rahht here in Alabama!"

But Aneb wasn't qualified for the job, Teague said. In facet, Teague didn't feel Aneb had a place in the company at all--not even as a janitor. This company was just not a good fit, the interviewer had said.

Aneb thought he understood the hatred that drove people to actually go ahead and blow up places like this; and then he was immediately ashamed. Even a thought like that was enough to set back his people--the true people, not the crazies with nothing better to do than play human chess and keep score with lives. He said a quick prayer for forgiveness at such wicked thoughts, and took a moment to reflect at the kindness Allah had showed him and all his true brothers: some of the brightest minds, some of the toughest bodies, some of the strongest determinations.

Aneb raised his head, and found it really wasn't that hard to smile. There were a billion other places to work, after all; he could make a difference anywhere. This one closed-minded, hard-souled company was a flash in the pan.

And with a new resolution, Aneb turned and walked down the steps, never even turning around to look back at Equal America for Immigrants and Unfortunates.

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Hunger is the universal blanket under which we all find discontent. Discontent is the omnipotent god to which we all sacrifice our tears. We swim in an ocean of tears in search of further shores to soothe our souls. We find the beaches and islands in the stills of the oceans barren of sustenance, wanting for substance, yearning for something more. And we curl up once again, welcoming a night of dreaming for something better, pulling the blanket up over our heads in the dark.

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I have the justice. You have the jaundice. Here is the thing we have both searched for. It is freedom; it is restraint. What is inside this puzzle is simplicity itself; and we cannot decipher its meaning. We are paradox. We are confusion. We are the straightline equation of nature plus god. We see what does not exist; we are blind to the walls we build in front of each other. We rant and we cry and we hope and we cry and we dream and we cry. Happy is the head that was shriven of the crown tonight.


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A noose and a necktie are too similar for my liking.
© Copyright 2025 Boulden Shade (fka Jeff Meyer) (centurymeyer35 at Writing.Com). All rights reserved.
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