My minds my worst enemy....

A short draft

I was used to always reacting on impulse. My mind made me feel trapped, like I was always sat in a room watching a game I couldn't control. I always pushed everyone away because I was afraid they'd hurt me. Using drinking straight liquor to keep my mind hazed. Only when I was drunk did I feel like I was in control.

It felt like I was watching someone live my life for me. The voices playing in my head always seemed right. The endless thoughts while lying down. I couldn't drown out my own mind. It was on repeat. Always overthinking and comparing myself to others. Trying to change myself to fit in. Yet my mind still wasn't happy.

Always crying in my bed, unable to control my own thoughts and actions. It felt like my mind was trying to turn me against it, like it wanted me to fight back. But I couldn't seem to fight back, I felt drawn into my own world my mind had set up. Stuck in a timeless loop of rumination unable to hold back any of the intrusive thoughts thrown at me. I prayed to god my mind would be fixed. Yet those were never answered. Seems the only way it would be answered was if it was written in my blood. My own mind was eating me alive and I couldn't stop it.