I Take Poisons Instead of Truth

There's temptations that surround me that poison the mind and body

Recently I wake up there's many poisons around me. The poisons of temptations. The poisons of misery that many face yet few willing to admit they exist even few willing to fight back against them. However, I must elaborate the poisons that I face are common poisons that we all see there everywhere. These poisons are bad ,but these ones are used to escape make myself feel better give me that rush of normalcy I feel I lack in my life from a world full of eyes staring as if they SEE me as a horrible monster. These poisons are the bottle and the cigarettes that push me recently to keep going.

Cigarettes have always been the easier one to use the ones that have been with me more then the bottle although the bottle is quickly taking its place as of late. As many people know cigarettes are bad for you ,yet often I find it difficult to look THROUGH the smoke that always seems so soothing so comforting in my times of struggles to let it surround me in its haze. It reminds me of things such as my father who although was by no means a perfect man is someone who has helped and supported my decisions even if they bring him worry. My Father was THE first to know in my family I was smoking as he actively does and likely will continue to SMOKE. Although, I admire him there's something I have inherited from him that will likely be a battle over the course of my years. I have been adopting his way of drinking the bottle bring greater "Comfort" ,AND soothing greater pains then a pack once did.

The Bottle does a lot in this world considered by many to be a great evil ,yet not everyone uses it for the evil of escaping pain. Many common people drink socially that's not evil its socializing your not alone with it letting it sway your mind. The BOTTLES have many different names depending on who you talk to some are vague and some are specific. For now I choose to be vague ,but personally I am more of a liquor person ,but I digress. There are many truths of the bottle and many LIES people say about its properties. The lies spread are dangerous and have repercussions many see coming ,yet choose to ignore because the pains we focus on we choose to drink away from sight letting them temporarily disappear instead of the long term solutions offered in out modern world. I have talked about more visual more physical poisons ,AND yet there's one I thinks is more dangerous than any bottle I have drank.

The mind is my greatest tool I own yet my mind is fogging over ,and changing the story constantly as it reminds me of pains I wish to forget. Things I wish I could drop and lighten the load off my weary shoulders a sight I wonder if I will ever SEE as time marches on. The mind pushes many people to make physical poisons seem reasonable as a healthy way to get rid of stress when it in fact clouds judgment and from what I've seen leads to spirals of self drought and hatred. THE most PAINFUL thing about this is we never really see the poison of the mind like an enemy. We treat it as a friend let his advice be the reason we never work towards that dream from our childhood ,or why we never live and see the suffocating coach more alluring to let us rot away in our wallowing misery. In the end, all these poisons distract from one thing that no one wants to acknowledge and that's the TRUTH ,that life is full of pain and we would rather chose poison then face it.