Remember To Always, Always Say Please

A Children's Book

Remember to Always, Always Say Please

In the house on the corner where the Jacksons dwell,
lived a big dog named Dan and a cat called Noel.
Noel the cat was a most clever sort —
not tricky and sneaky like their pet hamster Mort.

Now Mort was the sort who would steal all their cheese,
steal all their cheese and never say please.
He stole cheese for their salads, their soups, their main dishes.
He gobbled up Munsters and Cheddars and Swisses.
Yes, Mort stole all their cheese and never said please.

Now the big dog named Dan and the cat called Noel
knew it was Mort, but had no way to tell.
The Jacksons didn’t know who it could be —
who could it be that would steal all their cheese?
Steal all their cheese and never say please!

The cat called Noel and the big dog named Dan
knew it was up to them to come up with a plan —
a plan that would bring Mort to his knees,
bring Mort to his knees with his ill-gotten cheese.

“Hey Dan,” said Noel, “let’s make a trap!
No one’s better at trap-making than cats.
I can make a fine trap right out of this mat.”

“A trap from a mat?” said Dan. “That cannot be!
For no cat is better at trap-making than me.
I can make the best trap right out of this log —
a fact you’d well know if you were a dog.”

“Well, make your trap then,” said the cat called Noel.
“I’ll make mine too, and I’ll make it well!
Then we’ll see whose trap is the best —
whose trap will pass the cleverest test —
the trap that will finally capture that pest.”

And as the big dog named Dan and the cat called Noel,
who lived in the house where the Jacksons dwell,
ran off on their own to make their own traps…
Mort threw a party and invited some rats.

Rats, as you know, really love cheese —
and rats, I am told, never say please!
They gobbled the Jacksons’ cheese right away,
then turned to Mort and began to say,
“We know you’ve been storing cheese for a year!
We want that cheese now, so bring it right here!”

“Oh no!” cried Mort. “Not my cheese!
I invited you in to eat cheese for free —
but none of my cheese! You must leave my cheese be!”

The rats looked at Mort and called him by name.
“We came to eat cheese, Mort — that’s why we came!
Your cheese or their cheese, to us it’s the same.
We’ll eat every crumb ‘til no cheese remain!”

“Oh no!” cried Mort. “This cannot be!
These rats can’t eat all of my cheese —
eat all of my cheese and not even say please!”

Mort ran to get help. He hurried to Dan.
“Dan, you’re the man — the man with the plan!
I’m in a bind, I could sure use a hand!”

“Give you a hand?” said Dan. “Mort, you must be out of your mind!
You steal from the Jacksons, you rob them blind!
You steal all their cheese — all the cheese you can find!
You’re a thief and a hamster — and that’s the worst kind!”

Mort ran to Noel. “Noel, my old pal!
I haven’t sat and talked with you in a while.
You’re looking quite nice,” said Mort with a smile.

“Go away, Mort — I’m busy,” said Noel with a growl.

At that very moment, they heard a strange sound.
They ran from their rooms — and guess what they found?
There were rats everywhere, scurrying around.
There were rats everywhere both upstairs and down.

“Oh no!” cried Mort. “This cannot be!
There are rats everywhere, and they’re looking for cheese!
Please help me, you guys, to get rid of these rats.
Please help me, you guys, before the Jacksons get back!
I know I was wrong for stealing their cheese —
I’ll give it all back if you’ll help me, please!”

So the cat called Noel and the big dog named Dan
knew it was time to carry out their plan.
They knew it was time to test their traps —
they knew it was time to capture those rats!

“Dan,” said Noel, “let’s use your trap!
I’m sure you made a fine trap with your mat.
And I’m sorry I said dogs are better than cats.”

“No,” said Noel, “let’s use both traps —
with a mat and a log we’ll catch all those rats!
A mat and a log will make the best trap of all,
just like the team of a cat and a dog.”

“Mort,” said Noel, “we’ll help you out.
We’ll get those rats out of this house!
But first, we’ll need some bait for our traps.
Go get your cheese — and bring it right back!”

“But how can I get it without being seen?
There are rats everywhere, if you know what I mean!
There are rats everywhere, scurrying around.
There are rats everywhere, both upstairs and down.”

“I will help you,” came a small sound from the ground.
Dan, Noel, and Mort all looked around.
To see what had made that tiniest sound —
a very small rat is what they found!
“My name is Boo,” he said, “and I will help you.”

Noel looked at Boo and gave him a stare.
“I don't know where you came from, I sure don't know where.
But Boo, you're a rat too.
What makes you think we would trust you?”

“Why wouldn’t you trust me?” said Boo to the cat.
“You think you can’t trust me because I’m a rat?
You trust the dog, and you are a cat —
and look at the hamster, he looks up to you!
When I saw the three of you working together, I thought you knew —
it’s not what you are, it’s what you do.”

Mort looked at Boo and said, “You’re a smart little rat,
and we could sure use your help with setting our trap.”

“You’re right,” said Dan. “I trust you, Boo.”
“Me too,” said Noel. “We all trust you.”

Dan and Noel ran off to fetch the traps,
while Boo ran off to distract the rats.
Mort got his cheese, and together they baited the traps.

“Hey, you guys! I’ll give you my cheese —
I’ll give you my cheese if you follow me, please!”

The rats followed Mort right into the traps,
and the traps caught the rats — as simple as that!

Once caught in the traps, the rats started to plead,
“Set us free, please. We promise to leave.
We promise to leave if you set us free, please.”

Set free from the traps, the rats went away.
Dan, Noel, and Mort learned a big lesson that day.
They learned that lesson from a small rat named Boo —
it’s not what you are, it’s what you do.

And Mort learned another big lesson too.
Stealing is wrong no matter what.
It’s better to ask for the things that you want,
whether it’s toys or presents or candy or cheese.
And remember to always, always say please.