This is a poem I wrote to describe how I feel most of the time. |
I'm a very happy person...
except when I'm depressed. But I can put on a smile... And make you think I'm at my best. I hide my lonelyness and fears I don't want you to see The hurt and anger and the pain Welling up inside of me. People look at me and say There goes a happy girl No one really knows What goes on in my world No one knows the pain I go through everyday I keep my feelings locked inside I never really say The hurt I feel each morning The tears I cry at night The pain builds up inside of me But I keep it locked up tight No one is allowed To break the seal into my heart They don't know I put a smile on my face Even though I am sad right from the start. My friends tell me I'm cheery And that I am a clown No one knows that lurking behind my smile Is a permanent frown I hide my pain in happiness I like to make others smile It brings me joy to see my friends Being happy for a while But sooner or later I'll be alone With my pain once more And the hurt will come back so strong It will knock me to the floor The tears will make me shake so bad And I'll cry and cry and cry Who would ever guess that happy girl Could be living such a lie? But I hide my feelings deep inside You don't know I'm really sad So if one day you find me crying Please don't feel too bad Because I put on my happy face Even when I am depressed So that the whole world will always think That I am at my best I've learned to hide the anger I've learned to hide the pain I've learned to hide the hurt And with this I've gained The ability to carry on And always wear a smile To make everyone else believe That their life can be worthwhile I want the world to be happy I don't care about me I want my loved ones to be happy Which is why they cannot see That's while outside I am smiling And joking around Inside I am crying And wear a heavy frown, Because I am a happy person... Except when I'm depressed. But I can put on a smile... And make you think I'm at my best. |