The Boys and the Barrel

The boys, and the barrel

Eddie, Tommy, and I were spending part of a summer at our grandparent's house. Pappy, my grandfather, had just finished his morning project, and was watching a baseball game on TV. He quietly enjoyed his baseball games. I would watch the game and him. His eyelids would become heavy, and by the third inning he was sleeping and snoring with a low shallow rhythm. I think watching baseball was a cover for a well-deserved nap. I don't ever remember seeing him make it past the fourth inning fully awake. He would respond to a good play. He would open his eyes to check out what was happening, but soon the fatigue would reassert itself, and he would fall back into his nap. I guess keeping up with three young boys was a serious chore. If we boys became too active for him to nap he would send us outside to play in his yard.

"Boys get outside and play for a while," Pappy stated.

Were left quickly to find entertainment. We made the usual stops in the yard. We found a large spider's web in the corner of Pappy's front porch. We would catch insects and feed them to the spider. We would watch closely with excitement and horror as the spider attacked the insect usually an ant, and then carefully wrapped it up for a future meal. (I probably don't have to say that the spider was very well fed.)

Tommy would say, “Oh, that’s gross!”

Eddie thought it was just mean. He even suggested we kill the spider.

I said, "no way it's natural nature."

Eddie didn't understand what I was trying to say. I just thought it was cool to watch. After about a dozen ants the spider would quit attacking the hapless offerings, and we would move on to the next point of interest.

We found a nest of yellow jackets in the outside wall of Pappy's basement. The yellow jackets were busy coming and going. The movement in and out of the wall fascinated us. If the yellow jackets weren’t moving at a quick enough pace to keep us interested, we would get a baseball bat and strike the masonry wall of their nest. You had to move fast as their reaction was quite quick. The yellow jackets were good at finding the source of their disturbance. There were only three types of explorers that embarked on a mission of this nature: the quick, the quicker, and the slow-to-react- “granny, I got stung!” explorer. We all escaped without being stung that day. We almost always managed to move fast enough to avoid the very mad flying creatures. This event would leave us very stimulated. Our next adventure would have to be even more exciting, more daring, and if possible even more dangerous.

The barrel at the bottom of Pappy’s drive way caught our interest. It had some water in it, so we pushed it over. Watching the water wipe out an ant nest was fun, as we pretended it was a tidal wave crushing an entire civilization.

As the puddle subsided and ants began to recover from the sudden tidal wave in the mountains, Tommy said, "well that was fun now what do we do."

I kicked the barrel and it rolled. The best idea I ever had began to form in my mind.

"Hey guys help me push this barrel up the hill," I said.

We pushed the barrel up the hill in the middle of Pappy's gravel driveway. A quick push and down the driveway it went, until for no known reason, it suddenly turned right, and ran into old oak tree. The sudden stop was loud and inspiring.

My imagination was running at full throttle. I began to develop an even better plan. We could get into it and roll down the hill. It would be like taking off on a rocket and reentering the earth's atmosphere in a space capsule.

I suggested Tommy the youngest astronaut, be the first to try out my idea. He did not want to be the first in space from our family.

“No I am not doing it,” he said.

"Why not, I’ll give you a quarter", I said, trying to bribe him.

“No way I’m scared, besides I could get hurt, I'm too little!” Tommy protested.

“I’ll do it for the quarter", Eddie said bravely.

The deal was done.

Eddie jumped in; and I admired him for his bravery, and I made sure he new I thought he was brave.

I gave Eddie the best complement I ever gave him. “Eddie you are like John Glenn!” I said with excitement.

Eddie the brave, Eddie the first astronaut smiled, and waved to us as he entered the 55-gallon Mercury space capsule.

I wished I had a camera for this exciting moment in history. Tommy and I wanted him to have a good launch, so we gave him an official Nasal count down. We even managed to put a couple of delays for unknown engineering problems, and one for the weather. Eddie started to complain it was taking too long, and he was getting a cramp from the tight quarters of the capsule. We finished the countdown quickly, and we pushed the barrel one third of the way down the hill and launched it with one final push.

Eddie and the barrel were moving fast, and once again, the barrel with out warning took a sudden right turn, and smacked into the old oak tree. Eddie crawled-tumbled out of the barrel; he was disoriented by the quick spinning ride and stunned by the sudden stop. When Eddie appeared, we applauded and cheered his bravery. We had had many questions for him.

Tommy the reporter asked the first question, "So tell the people watching at home what is like to be in space.

Eddie said, "it is not easy, but if we could avoid the Old oak tree, he would do it again in a minute.

Tommy began to ask another question but Eddie recalled his pre-launch deal.

"Hey where is my quarter?" Eddie commanded.

"I'll give it to you later," I said.

"Hey! You said you'd give me a quarter!" he protested.

"Don't worry, you'll get your quarter!" I promised. (I think I still owe him that quarter.)

Since Eddie proved space travel was indeed safe for mankind, Tommy and I each took turns going down the hill, with very predictable results: We both smacked into the oak tree as well.

We were not satisfied we needed more. We needed more speed, more danger, more excitement, and a longer space ride. We soon discovered that the barrel could hold two astronauts.

Instead of a Mercury mission we would have a Gemini mission! I could provide the energy, and the direction, to make it all the way down the driveway. I had to convince Tommy and Eddie it was a safe mission, and I would not push the capsule too hard, and I would not allow it to hit the oak tree again.

"Come on guys you know it will be cool." I pleaded.

The boys finally gave into my arguments, and were soon in their positions.

I asked, "are the astronauts ready to be launched into space?"

Eddie spoke up and said, "Hurry my neck hurts!"

Tommy said, "Yea so does mine."

I started the countdown, "10, 9, 8, 7, 6,"

Tommy yelled, "hey wait a minute I got a cramp."

I knew additional delays might cost us the launch window, and we could lose the entire project. I began to believe the astronauts might actually quit the mission.

So I Launched Tommy and Eddie down the hill while still on the count of six. I managed a really good start, and stayed with the barrel. It was easy getting up more speed and energy as the extra weight of the second astronaut added more potential energy. I was prepared to steer the barrel past the oak tree but having a second astronaut also balanced the capsule. We went right past the old oak tree. Tommy let go of his position in the capsule and came rolling out.

Tommy complained, "Hey this was too fast for me. How come I had to be on the end? You don't care about me! I hurt my elbow," Tommy cried.

I had to ignore him, because Eddie could still make the bottom of the hill! We were almost there!

"Hey stop this thing, it's going too fast!" Eddie pleaded.

I quickly added more energy to the barrel. I was afraid my one remaining astronaut would bail out on the project.

“Your are doing great Eddie!” I yelled.

It was tough being mission control. Especially when I also had to be engine of this rocket, and on top of that, the astronauts were complaining, all the time. It was the distractions, and the noise generated by my complaining brothers, and my sincere focused effort to push the space capsule to a higher orbit, that I over looked the Ford Galaxy parked at the bottom of the hill.

The barrel -- I mean, the capsule -- struck the rear bumper with real force. There was a loud metal-to-metal thump. A wail, and tears followed the thump from Eddie. Tommy was still crying from the raspberry on his elbow.

"Are you trying to kill me Eddie screamed and began rubbing his neck and head?

The noise plus Tommy’s and Eddie’s alternating protests and crying awakened the sleeping Pappy.

I looked up when I heard, “boys what are you doing now?”

It was Pappy and he was moving fast, down the hill towards me. Pappy seldom moved quickly. He had a bad hip, and had to drag his left leg. His quick movements surprised me, and his anger surprised me even more. He was mad! I moved to keep out of his way, as he tried a couple of times to get me in his grasp. I knew he was just getting madder so I gave up the chase, and he grabbed my arm. Pappy stretched me out, and started striking me with a switch on my jean covered bottom.

Where in the heck did he get that? I thought. Looking back he had hedges all around his yard. I now know they could provide a good source of small semi-straight sticks. It was a fact that seemed unimportant to me previous to events of this day.

Pappy was giving the boys and me a lecture on not causing so much turmoil in an otherwise quiet morning.

Tommy and Eddie were spared any physical correction due to their soggy emotional state.

We all said, “I’m sorry Pappy, we won’t do it again.”

Pappy accepted our apologies and said, "You boys are something else".

After a few teaspoons of our tears, Pappy's heart softened. He gave me a hug, and said, "I love you Timmy, and I just need you boys not to get into any more trouble. I am old, and I need some rest, and a little quiet time.

I replied,” I love you too, Pappy," and hugged him hard.

He smiled and gently said, "All right boys, let's go in the house, and watch the rest of the game.

We three boys ended up on the couch sitting close together. Tommy fell asleep first with his head in my lap. Eddie eyes closed next. The last thing I remember before I fell asleep was Pappy sitting in his chair laughing quietly and shaking his head.