Still Here.

They say you don't know what
you have till it's gone,
and those words have never rang truer
than when I lost you.
Some days you seem so far away,
so out of reach and there's this
empty aching hole
where you used to be.
Yet I know that as long as I have your memory,
and as long as you hold your place in my heart
you're never truly gone, never truly lost.
But I need so much more
than just old words on a page.
I want so much more than just a photograph.
If I could say just one thing to you,
it would be how much you meant to me.
If I could ask God just one question,
it would be, what happened?
If there was just one thing I'd have you know,
it would be, I will never forget you.
Looking back, I realize there was so much more
I could have said,
and should have done.
Looking back,
I wish I would have known what I know now.
I can only hope
I was who you needed me to be and nothing less.
Looking back,
I think maybe it's time to let you go,
but I don't know if I can.
And I don't know if you would want me to.
Would you understand?
I wish I knew what you would do.
I'm still here, still waiting, still hoping,
still praying, and still missing you.
Wherever you are, your memory will always bring
tears to my eyes and a smile to my face.