In life there is death and love for those who seek it. |
Mon Petite Ami I remember the first time I met you. Like it was yesterday, I was walking to the library, it was raining and you knocked me over off the sidewalk into a puddle in the street. I remember you laughed helplessly as I yelled at you, shaking my finger at you, scolding you for laughing, for not apologizing. I remember how bright your eyes were. I remember thinking that I'd never seen such a shade of gray and blue before..Utterly captivating, breath- taking. I think that's when I fell in love. Not love at first site. Not even I'm that naïve. I think it was your laughter that first drew me to you. Moth to the flame non? I'd never heard anyone laugh so openly, so...librement; especially not at me. You asked me to coffee after that. I think I said no that first time. Or maybe I just ran away from you. I don't remember the next few days, they're all a blur of embarassment. I never realized I had classes with you, I didn't think we did. But you followed me day after day, listening to my conversation's, and sometimes..just laughing at me. When you showed up at my apartment after almost two monthes of following me I thought I'd file a restraining order. Then you started singing my favorite song. I was teased so many times after that by my roomates. I talked to you the next day. Tried to make you see that I just wasn't one of those guy's who liked other men. I think you knew more than I did because you just grinned crookedly and nodded. After that every time I saw you I stopped thinking coherently. I found myself noticing the oddest things. The way you walk for example, absolument ravissant. Your hips lilt to the left more than they should, it's absolutely captivating, and your smile...god's you could melt a glacier with that smile. Délicieux ! I should have figured it out sooner...that I loved you I mean. I couldn't believe what I'd heard. How could it have happened. You shouldn't have died that way. You shouldn't have died period. I remember you in the hospital. Your crooked grin in place, looking for all the world as though you KNEW you were going to die. The Doctor's said there was just to much internal bleeding. Why though? Why would something happen like that? How could it have happened? You died at 3 A.M. I remember I cried, kissed you softly...and I left. So here I am now, on a hill, in the rain and Im laughing. I think this is something one could call ironic. Only your IN the ground instead of on it, and the rain is sadder, angrier. You had no relatives....I couldnt belive it. The doctor's and lawyer's said I could choose what to put on your tombstone. I didn't even know your name. The rain came down in torrents as the last of the funeral goer's left the hill side. Nobody knew the man in the long black coat, with shining blond hair and the sad piercing green eyes. Everyone thought, well perhaps he was a lover or close friend. Poor boy. The blond stood above the freshly buried grave, tears intermingling with the rain, noone but the wind could hear him whisper the words written on the gray stone. Edward Drake Corner -2-10-1981 -2-11-1997 Je ne vous ai jamais connu assez bon mais je vous ai aimé davantage que la vie elle-même. On that hill in the pouring rain the wind began to howl. ~Fin~ |