State of the Geek Union

State of the Geek Union

You may be asking yourself: “Who is this guy, and why does he get to write the State of the Geek Union?” To this I have to respond: I’m a geek and no one else is likely to do it, so learn to cope. It’s high time the geeks of America reevaluated their lives.

First, to define geek: dictionary.com defines geek and nerd almost exactly the same, so for the purpose of this essay, the words will be interchangeable. And when I say geek or nerd, I refer to the peculiar social animal who most often is a player of video games, student of science, collector of Sci-fi paraphernalia and so on and so forth. To see the classic, correct form of geek, you need but watch any 80s teen movie, and there’s at least one true-to-life geek stereotype. Now, on to my point.

American geek culture is in peril. With the advent of “Geek chic” and influx of Japanese culture into American geekdom, we are all in danger of losing our identity. More and more are we seeing the popularization of geekiness: cool kids are displaying traditionally geek characteristics and we are beginning to see a new generation of geek hybrids.

Geek has suddenly become “cool” in some circles, a fashion and lifestyle statement. Thick black glasses have become truly popular, even attractive to today’s audience. In pop culture, geeks are becoming better looking and more heroic. Movies star geeks now instead of ridiculing them! What happened to the 70’s and 80’s when geeks were either the butt of every joke or even the antagonist in popular movies? How far have we fallen?

Furthermore, what has happened to the true, deep geeks that even pop culture cannot accept? Gone are the days of Dungeons and Dragons; now is the era of Yu-Gi-Oh and DDR. This is unacceptable! Average American children are being raised on card games. Even the kids who grow up and ridicule geeks later have had some experiences with them. No child can even fathom Dungeons and Dragons before they’re old enough to realize its inherent geekiness. And DDR? Physical activity? A geek values not these things! The very idea of rhythm and movement is anathema to geek culture.

What’s more, where are the great sci-fi movies like those of the past? Now geeks are all watching anime, or pop culture hybrids like I, Robot. Attempts at pure geek movies fall terribly flat, as proven by the atrocious Dungeons and Dragons. Gone are the days of cult classics like Short Circuit, Logan’s Run, Blade Runner and The Day the Earth Stood Still. No they weren’t spectacular, and didn’t always make a lot of sense, but they belonged to the geek alone.

Geek literature is just as bad. Classics like Heinlein novels, Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy, Snow Crash, and Neuromancer have fallen by the wayside as geeks read more and more consistently anime comic books and books based off of things like Magic cards and popular computer games.

I say, this cannot happen! Eschew popular culture and foreign influence, geeks of America! Return to your roots! We may not have respect, and we may not have popularity, but if we have our identity, then we need nothing else.

But if we allow ourselves to be sucked into the morass of American and Japanese pop culture, then all our years of being tripped in the lunchroom and having sand kicked in our faces are in vain! Don’t give in to the pressure of the world! Stay strong, and may the force be with you, always.