Healing My Wounded Heart

Feel no hope, don't give up, get back up.

The feeling of no hope
Leaves me feeling empty
Like breathing your last breath, so,
uneasily

I still hold on trying to cope
Exhausted on only 2 hours of sleep
Walking over piles of snow
In the rain, for miles
and miles in heels
not meant for my feet to even feel

Awake and alert for more than 3 days
On 2 hours of sleep
This 1, singular, not single person,
is all alone
and I'm so hungry

It's like my energy was stolen from me
There is no more me
The giving up of hope is the worst feeling
Doubt and disappointment accompany me
I feel like just giving up

As I lose all sight for my destination
Erasing the path I must choose to succeed
It's the devil
It's my strive, he is stealing
I break down like
the water breaks loose just before
child birth
I fall to the ground
Weak and loose
like a dead corpse
I am down and blue and lost all hope
I cry my eyes beat red and bright blue
I pop the blood vessels from holding my breath so hard
trying even harder not to cry
by focusing on squeezing and contracting
til I can't breathe in again
Thinking about how hard I tried
How hard I'm crying
How hard I was trying
Failing
Feel like I'm dying
Seeing no purpose for my own existence
No one's why
No why for my
SELF

It's time.

Realize.

Time to heal.

Get back up

I pick my head up
Wipe away my tears
Take a deeper breath
And get off to a new start
On the process
Of healing my wounded heart