Mister Wonka and the Neonate Nursery

A parody of the 1971 film using one punishment and one child with doting, coddling parents

This is a parody of Roald Dah's Charlie and the Chocolate Factory using Willy Wonka and the Oompa Loompas. It is not an add on to the story, or a spin-off of any of the characters, but a scene for a new kid who visited the factory accompanied by both his parents, very loving, very doting, but overly mortifying and overly pampering. Their son, Humphrey Hildegarde (his mother is Pam and his father is Hugh, you will see why they all got their names later) is the all-time brat embodying the gluttony of Augustus Gloop, the pride and pushiness of Violet Beauregarde, the greed of Veruca Salt, and the sloth and peevishness of Mike Teevee. His behavior infantile.

This story in terms of the relationship between the parents and their son is reminiscent of my other parody idea, which several readers here saw, of where a young boy visits the North Pole with his parents who share the same exact bond, and the young boy embodies the same persona as the child here. The overall message in that story is essentially the same, with a similar outcome, but in this story, the boy is not in serious harm, despite his ordeal. It is more of a comedic short with a beautiful message throughout than a throughout trip. In the Christmas parody, I am working on as well and will share when complete, Willy Wonka is Santa Claus, the elves are the Oompa Loompas (twelve of them), and Krampus is Slugworth, here Slugworth is not featured.

I hope you enjoy this story. If you have any tips on how I can improve it, please share, thank you. It is a rough draft, so it will constantly be worked on, so expect several changes, but this majorly how it will go.

Willy Wonka is showing guests a milky fountain. "The Everlasting Milky Way, I call it" Wonka beamed with a smile, the guests star in awe. "But, not for swimming, just drinking. "I can swim in that!" A boy visitor brags. "Our competitive swimmer" his mother beams. He jumps in, "I would not do that, boy" Willy Wonka warns, "It will have strange ... effects." The boy ignores him. "Look at you go son!" His father proudly says, "Even in milk, he exceeds!" Suddenly, the boy struggles. "Mom, Dad, save me, please!" "My baby! What is happening to him? Somebody, save him!" His mother cries frantically, "He will drown! Humphrey Hildegard, get out of there!" "Not with these" Willy Wonka says offering the boy a pair of cylindrical armbands used for swim, half as a gag half to provide safety. The swimmies blew up fast.

The boy for a moment was still. "See? Already achieving! Safety first, son, safety first!" The father proudly said, but bad turned to worse, and his parents were terrified for the safety of their son, the mother gently pushing the father forward to do something. "What type of joke is this?" The father shouts, "Save our son, you mad man!" "He will be fine" Willy Wonka assured him. Almost from nowhere, a fishing net emerged bringing the boy safely to land. "Our boy! He's a baby!" His mother yelled. "Baby, you are a baby, baby!" She said, an inconvenient pun, "My precious!" "We will sue you for this, Mr. Wonka!" She threatened. Her baby now resembled a nine months old infant, with some hair on his head, could amazingly still stand, and talk though it was mostly babble. He was sporting a buttoned undershirt, a waist belt, and a pair of sweatpants, all fit for comfort.

"Dear, he seems to be fine. He will not demand anymore, that is for sure." The father told his wife ever the optimist. His mother stopped and reconsidered. "Well, he is certainly cute, that is for sure." She said embracing her baby son in a tight hug, his clothes magically clean. "What do we have here?" Willy Wonka said. "A fresh start, a clean slate, a new model - of baby." "A whole new flavor, don't you agree, child?" Willy Wonka said, "How about a lollipop for all safe and sound" he said handing the boy a swirling lollipop. "Say thank you, sweetie pie" the mother told her child, but her boy just babbled. The baby gave the lollipop a good lick as his clothes started to strain.

"What is happening to his outfit?" The mother inquired. The buttons the romper flew off one by one, and the waist belt strained. "I feel funny!" The baby cried. "You are funny, honey!" His parents said, but out of a misguided love not a harsh mockery. "Our little guy!" Suddenly, the mother noticed something sticking out his clothes were starting to expose, a white, clean diaper. "Aw, honey!" The mother cooed. "Your little diaper, it is sticking out" she and the father meticulously tried to push it back in, as his face reddened. They pretended to struggle. Suddenly, his clothes ripped, but his diaper amazingly stayed in place, revealing itself to all the other guests. "Aw, honey, it took you years to get out of your nappies and swimmies!" Mortifying him even more, as she patted his nappy. "Mommy" he tried to babble.

Out of nowhere, the tabs on the diaper popped, his face burning red. "Honey, what happened to your Huggies?" The mother asked. "Or Pampers, or Luvs" the father added, unhelpful to the situation. The guests laughed. "Stop that!" The mother said trying to shut them down. "It is not our baby's fault, he always needed the biggest diapers!" "He was always a big baby!" The father added, not to disparage his son, but as if it was an achievement. The parents tried to secure his tabs as he pushed himself around wishing to flee. "Stand still, sweetie" his mother instructed, softly. Suddenly, the tapes magically attached themselves. "Crisis averted" the father beamed, as he and his wife gently rested their hands on his puffy diaper.

The situation did not end there. His diaper out of nowhere started to expand, like a balloon, staying normal sized and clean. "Baby, your diaper!" The mother cried, not in disgust, but in total amazement, "It is blowing up! Your diaper is blowing up like a balloon!" Mortifying him further. "Wait!" His mother said as her eyes shifted to oversized safety pins, "Are those pins on his nappy?" "Safety pins - on a disposable diaper?" The father asked. "We cannot have that, we want our big guy to be comfy" the mother beamed as she and her husband tried to unpick the pins. The baby squealed in mortification, flapping his hands trying to swat them away, but his arms fattened. "We are trying to help you, sweetie! Please do not be difficult!" His mother said. As he tried to move his hands, he was fully rounding. He was not turning into a grotesque blimp, but rather a cute globe.

--- End of draft, stay tuned for the rest of the story
-- Ratings are up to you, but if you wish to rate, please do not rate until the story is finished, thank you, you will be surprised by what is coming, trust me, nothing horrible, just very, very surpising