Chris' Christian Blog

Gifts

"Gifts" 

Dostoevsky wrote his best work after facing a firing squad. I'd say that was a pretty magnificent feat. After all not too many people survive a firing squad! Dostoevsky did though and the experience brought his best out of him.

Life has a tendency to be extremely hard. There are no rule books or owners manuals issued and we basically learn as we go. When we are young many of us take life for granted and have idealistic ideas of what the world should be like. We often try to change the world to our liking and in the end we realize that the only part of the world we can change is ourselves.

When I was young life was one struggle after another. I was raised in an alcoholic home so my life at home was chaotic at best. I was not popular at school so my public life left a lot to be desired as well. I often wondered why God was punishing me? To escape the chaos I escaped into the distorted world of drug addiction and spent many years there. My favorite food were cheese and whine. Yes, whine was used as a pun there. I was constantly feeling sorry for myself and looking for somebody or something to fix the world. I didn't realize the world was okay. I needed fixed!

I finally came to a crisis in my life when a preacher and I had words. I realized through the foggy thinking that he was right. I was a mess. I got clean and stayed that way. Looking back I can see that each crisis in my life was not punishment from God as I once thought. Instead they were gifts from God wrapped in some really strange packages. Without them I wouldn't have the wisdom and insight that makes me who I am today.