Very, very well said. I enjoyed your sharing of this information as it should be publicly announced as to what is really happening out there.
It is a sadden day when big corporations shun their responsibilities and not do what is humanly right.
It is also been known that since the beginning of the use of asbestos, it was dangerous but that the dangers would not be apparent until some 20 - 30 yrs. later. Why then tell the public of the dangers when the use out weighs the later unfortunate. Such is a crime gone way to long without obligations for its contention.
I applaud you for your efforts in your research and studies on this matter.
Well done.
Continue with the great work,
Your WDC Brother, Dave...
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Welcome to WDC, I hope you enjoy all that this site has to offer;
You did an excellent job with story, I really enjoyed reading it. You put the meaning across very well to the reader and you were very descriptive throughout. I did not find any spelling errors, however I did pick up on a few mistakes of how you worded some sentences, they were as follows:
In Chapter 6 {“My hand got stucked under the books.“No daddy, it didn’t get hurted at all, see?”} In this sentence the word "stucked" should have been stuck. and the word "hurted" should be hurt.
In Chapter 7 {“Yes honey, you neverlet a stranger take you,} The word neverlet should be two words as in "never let" I am sure this was just an over site of spacing.
In Chapter 9 {He would just have to go to out and get more lumber.} This should read as: "He would just have to go out and get more lumber" omit the second use of the word "to".
And in Chapter 10 {He was l ying on the sidewalk beside lumber that would never be part of a playhouse.} I found that the letter "L" in lying was on one line while the remaining part of this word "ying" was on the next line of the sentence. Skip the space between these two letters and it becomes the one word you meant it to be, only on the same line. Also insert the word "the" between beside and lumber to make this sentence flow better.
All in all you did a wonderful job at writing this story. These were just minor errors and easily correctable.
Continue with the great work,
Your WDC Brother, Dave...
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Hello,
Your first word "Why" signifies a question or one to follow therefore it should have a question mark after it instead of a period. and again in the first line after the words "do you" another question mark is needed. Just a minor mistake.
As I was always taught, it is better to go over and proof read your own work first, prior to submitting it and you will catch a lot of your own mistakes and thus make the corrections yourself.
Take the time and be patient with yourself and all will be great in time.
Continue with the great work,
Your WDC Brother, Dave...
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Nice, very nice. Hi, and welcome to WDC. To every thing there is a reason and God explains it so. Yes if we are to survive by eating other animals, fruits and plants then the reason for mosquitoes is to feed other living things, they are the food for other living creatures and thus life is a circle of living creatures eating each other just to survive. I liked your prayer and thanks for praying for all.
Keep up with your writing and faith in God.
Feel free to explore my port folio and review as you wish.
Continue with the great work,
Your WDC Brother, Dave...
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Your poem reflexs the cowboy and the meaning was put across just fine. I think it to be a little short but then there are many poems of different length. Your rhyming scheme is fine in each stance. I found no mistakes, great job. Keep up the good work in your writing and reviewing.
Dave
Continue with the great work,
Your WDC Brother, Dave...
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Hi, And welcome to WDC. I hope you have great times in your writing/reviewing.
You wrote a great story and gave a very good opinion of fact, however I found several mistakes throughout your writing in that there were missing words that would make the sentence flow more smoothly. You should always remember to proof read your work prior to submitting it. This should become a practice and thus making yourself a better writer and reviewer. I give you a higher rating for the great efforts in your work regardless of the mistakes.
Practice makes perfect as I have always been told and true it is.
Continue with the great work,
Your WDC Brother, Dave...
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I am not sure exactly what you were trying to portray here.You lost me. Was it the Girl at a ticket booth and needing to fill out an identification form in order to get a plane ticket or the fact that this alcoholic person kept missing his appearance date in front of the Irish police. You really had me confused of the whole story. What did if anything, it have to do with speeding? The title implies the story would have to do with speeding, but I don't see where it did.
Sorry but I think this could use more work to better the readers understanding of the plot.
Continue with your work,
Your WDC Brother, Dave...
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I had to respond to this as I felt it was all hogwash. Not to degrade your writings or your thoughts or the fact that an atheist in fact is a believer of God. For if he believes that god does not exist then he must believe that he existed at one point in order to day that he doesn't. Because in order to not believe in something is to believe that it existed in the first place other wise there wouldn't be the thought that it didn't exist.
The most important point or thought in your whole piece is this. If you want to take the chance and say there in not a God this is your choice, however do you want to also take the chance on your living forever in to the eternal lake of fire for your non belief?
That is the question and only concern!!!
Which do you believe???
Continue with the great work,
Your WDC Brother, Dave...
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In this piece I felt the demons work upon the child. It was written well and the message was put across very well. For no one should have to endure such pain and discuss as with in this poem. The trueness of the facts are real as this type of abuse happens a lot in our society and should be dealt with the utmost punishments. I hope the child got away from all the abuse and could live on into a normal life. But as with most they are scared for life. My sympathies go out to all who have endured this pain and anguish.
Continue with the great work,
Your WDC Brother, Dave...
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I liked your poem and yes it was catchy as well as you did a great job with the rhyming scheme. I did note that your syllable count was a little erratic but wasn't too far off.
The rhythm flowed well for me and the meaning was put across very well too.
You kept your spacing between stanza's which makes for a neater and easier read.
Continue with the great work,
Your WDC Brother, Dave...
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Welcome to the great world of reading, writing, and reviewing of great stories, poems and the like. I am sure you will find this site and community a joy to your soul and release of tension.
Your poem was good and I like that you did use spacing between your stanzas.
You have however missed a number one rule of English and that is to always use a capital letter "I" and not a small case "i" when referring to oneself.
The meaning was well put forth and could be understood by all.
Continue with the great work,
Your WDC Brother, Dave...
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How elegantly put, You describe this setting so vividly that I could only vision that I was there seeing exactly what the writer saw as the painting began to flow oh so nicely on the canvas.
You did an excellent job with this piece. I wish that I could have had the opportunity to see this first hand as did the man at the church.
I hope you continue with your abilities in writing with such great descriptions and vividness.
A story only the heart could feel and see.
Continue with the great work,
Your WDC Brother, Dave...
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It all began as a determination on your part. and that determination is what got you going in the first place.
How far or how long can one go ultimately depends on that determination. If you loose the sight of that determination then all strength that goes along with it is lost as well and all seems to far of a reach and therefore we fall short and quit dead in our tracks.
If you keep sight of that reason you started out in the first place then your determination shall continue to strife with you and you shall achieve your goal at hand.
Keep the Lord at hand and he shall carry you when you feel you can't go any further.
Continue with the great work,
Your WDC Brother, Dave...
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I sense that you both had a terrible time the first couple of weeks after bringing home your baby. With all kinds of fears of things that could happen.
I feel for you as I have been there a few times, and let me assure you that anything that brings out those fears only helps to insure the safety of your child as you tend to be more cautious and aware of the needs of the child.
Yes a monitor really helps to ease the fears but please don't rely solely on that monitor, get up and check every so often so that you are physically sure of the safeness of your child.
Even as one gets older and becomes a toddler they need more watching and the awareness of their safety becomes more apparent.
Never take anything for granted when it comes to a child no matter how young or how old they are.
Good luck and may God give you both the strength you need along the way.
Continue with the great work,
Your WDC Brother, Dave...
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Hello there Ghetto Writer. I just want to welcome you to our community of Readers, Writers, and Reviewers here at WDC.
You will find it just amazing and a whole bunch of fun as well as get to know a lot of new and exciting people.
We are here to help with your needs in writing, reviewing and we even give our opinions and constructive criticism.
You have the start of a poem in the form sense and with a little more work I feel that you could have a great one.
As I said you started out in the poem form but you sort of lost it after the first paragraph. I also notice that you have what is called a run on sentence further on in you poem.
I would be more that happy to show you in a private e-mail how you can spruce up this and then I will re-review it for you if you like.
I usually use a formal format in my reviewing but am willing to give you a better chance to get a better rating.
Just remember that when anyone reviews it is just their opinions and please don't take it to heart as it is meant to correct those minor mistakes and we are all here to learn to better ourselves.
Please feel free to raid my port and let me know what you think.
Again welcome to WDC and Happy New Year! May you prosper through all that you do.
Continue with the great work,
Your WDC Brother, Dave...
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Hi there angel, and Welcome to the world of Reading, Writing, and Reviewing.I know that you will be pleased with this community as we try real hard to help in any manor that we can to better the writer. We are here to help and show the way through our many, many authors.
I felt the anger, upsettings within this poem from you and your children and I can only hope that you can find it in your heart to do the right thing as two wrongs don't make a right and its always best to teach our children what is right even if it means we must turn the other cheek.
Now on the other side of the note, I feel that even tho you have the potential of a good poem here , it wasn't put in that form. I would be more than glad to help you with this if you would like and than I can re-review it again.
A note of confidence; we all must start out practicing in order to achieve perfection, in fact I am still practicing myself.
Please look over my port and feel free to rate and review as you wish. I thank you for your time and again I welcome you on behalf of all WDC authors and readers.
Continue with the great work,
Your WDC Brother, Dave...
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Hi Maeko Winchester, and welcome to WDC. I hope you fine this web site interesting and fun to be into. This can be very rewarding for those that put forth a good effort to rate and review.
I find your poem has a very loving touch to it. and it was touching to my heart for the meaning was there. I did however find it a bit hard to know where you meant to stop with a sentence or paragraph and where you started with the next one.
It might help if you were to use more punctuations and separate your paragraphs or stanza's, as this would make it better for the reader to understand.
If you need a hand getting around or have a question please feel free to drop a line and ask. I'll do what I can to direct you in the right direction.
Continue with the great work,
Your WDC Brother, Dave...
Ahh, how adorable, the man buying the woman clothes. Well lets see I personally don't have a problem in buying woman clothing but here is what I would do if I ran into a snag like that. I would take the wife with me {or whom ever it was I was buying for} and have her tell me what she liked and what sizes if I was to buy them for her, then I would come back another time with my trusty note pad and buy them and when she opened them at home she would be all excited that you got her just what she liked.
If however she couldn't go with you in the first place then have a friend that knows her very well go with you.
I found this to be very hilarious.
I would have loved to have read more but you just ended it all when it was getting good. He,He,He...
Continue with the great work,
Your WDC Brother, Dave...
Hello Riss,
2nd. of 3 Reviews you won from "Kris's Christmas Sig/Banner Auction".
When I read this I can relate as I have gone through the same feelings with past relations. The bitterness that one feels is so great that we never want to get out there and pick up the pieces and start over but somehow we manage to do so and live on.
I feel the pain and loneliness as you have felt and the wonder of why did it all happen but please hold your self together keep the faith in God above all and He will pull you through it all.
The strength that we have to have from time to time can be tremendous and overwhelming but I can assure you that Love will find a way to return to you.
May the blessings of this Holy Christmas holiday bring much love and contentment to your heart.
Continue with the great work,
Your WDC Brother, Dave...
1 of 3 Reviews you won from "Kris's Christmas Sig/Banner Auction".
I feel your sadness when you speak of being ignored and the coldness. I know that we all get wrapped up in our busy daily lives and we sometimes don't think to give that quick smile or the gesture of the hand wave, but please don't take it to heart that there isn't even a thought in ones mind of the friends and family that mean so much.
If one doesn't take a moment to acknowledge than maybe we should initiate the gesture and there by not feeling ignored.
At this time of the season don't forget that we are all wrapped up in the spirit of giving and therefore we are busy in the shopping of such and not in to the thought of socializing.
In the spirit of Christmas may we all show our love and concerns for others as Christ Jesus does 365 days a year.
Haave a very merry Christmas and a safe, healthy, and prosperous New Year.
Continue with the great work,
Your WDC Brother, Dave...
Not a bad poem, Your meaning was well put across and I had no problem with this read. Your rhyming wasn't bad either.
I believe that the person that you are talking about in this poem is God the Father, talking to someone and referring to his own son Jesus in retrospect to the person he is talking to. At least this is the meaning I get from this poem.
In any case You did a fairly good job with this write.
Continue with the great work,
Your WDC Brother, Dave...
I agree whole heartedly with you on this one, You did a great job at putting across your meaning here.
If we can't speak our minds and have the choice to speak as we choose, than what in the hell are we protecting this freedom for, we America the land of the free?
Well, I say "It is about time to speak up and make it known, we wont stand by any longer, we have just as much right to voice our opinions and to partake in these rights just as much as those against it".
Again you have a valid point and I agree.
Merry Christmas,Dave...
Continue with the great work,
Your WDC Brother, Dave...
A truly great writing of the overview of ones life. The reader is left with feeling that the woman dies and never recovers from all this. As it wasn't stated as to what finally happens.
It is not always with a person dying, will their life pass by in a particular order nor would it be easy to find out unless that person died and came back to life. It is said that people will eventually revert back to their child hood as is the case here in this story.
"She looks over at her husband snoring on the chair acroos the starkly lit room,"
I believe that this is probably a typo but if not the word is spelled across. This was the only error that I found in your truly amazing story.
The best part I felt was the last part when she hears her own mother say "I will always be here for you".
That's a courageous woman.
"Happy Holidays"
Continue with the great work,
Your WDC Brother, Dave...
In reading your two part poem I felt your need to be free from this anguish and torment that you have been going through. I can't however relate to your experiences as I haven't been there at least not as bad. I can only tell you that I had an experience where I had been on medication for a long long time and I kept needing something stronger until I was taking enough to kill a horse,[at least that is what the doctors told me]. eventually I had to come to my own senses that I wasn't going to get better until I got off these damn pills and I had to do it on my own with my own will power. I did so, and I am a better person today for it. I now will not take this type of medication again or at least not unless I absolutely had to.
As far as your dilemma, I can only truly hope that you find a way to deal with this in a controllable way. It will be for the better of your life.
I feel your pain and wish you well.
This poem was well written in is't context. As far as the format I would add a few spaces between satnza's for a clearer read for the reader, and please use commas and periods where needed as all this adds to the way one perceives the meaning of the context.
Happy holidays,
Continue with the great work,
Your WDC Brother, Dave...
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