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 |  This is my blog & my hope, writing daily will help me see my progress and log supporters. |
| I received a text from Katie, our group facilitator, on Tuesday, telling me that there would be no meetings for two weeks. I had missed the week before because I wasn't ready to face the group knowing that I had to face the music on my decision to use. Once I knew the meeting wasn't on, my mind went to the couple who live just around the corner from me. I felt somewhat guilty that I hadn't made the effort to contact them. Ash had tried to show me friendship by sharing his cell number, but for reasons of my own, I thought better of making that call. Because I had healed well enough both mentally and physically from my fall, I made the call and was immediately invited to their home for dinner. It was great to get out of the house and the half a mile walk there had me burning even more calories than the bike ride earlier...a win-win if ever there was one. Of course, I told them about what had happened, hoping it wouldn't trigger a negative reaction from either of them. This is always a concern when dealing with addiction. The fear is my bad decision will in some way lead someone else to make a similar bad decision. But they were fine about it and had been doing really well themselves. We had curried sausages and vegetables that Ash made and after dinner, Tamara watched her soap while Ash and I sat outside and contemplated the universe. I didn't stay too long and enjoyed the walk home and for once, it felt nice to arrive at an empty house. I got myself some salted caramel ice cream for dessert and relaxed for the rest of the night. On the walk home from dinner, I suspected that my legs would feel the extra workload the next day. Riding a bike is easy when that's what you do, but walking a brisk half mile twice in one night is a different story altogether. Then, last night, my suspicions came to the fore when I couldn't sleep because of the aches and sharp, spasmodic pains in my thighs. I ended up taking a couple of paracetamol tablets at 2.00 am through sheer frustration and finally fell asleep. Today I got back out on my bike and rode like the wind. I wrote a reply to Stik's on a Boat's blog post today "American Hot Shit"  called Never Mind the Sean Connery Jokes, concerning therapy for men. It had me considering what is the best way to deal with our (men's) issues. I have come to the conclusion that no one form of therapy is enough to get a balanced outlook on life. We all need to feel good about ourselves and that includes both our mental and physical states. And although I advocated group sessions as a way to find camaraderie and others with similar issues, this method alone falls short of the mark because it doesn't focus on the crux of the issues and what causes those issues in the first place. One-on-one can focus in on them, but unless there is a healthy respect and a good connection between the counsellor and client, there may be a tendency to fall off before real progress can be made.The blog post I refer to asked the question of using exercise as a type of therapy...in a sense, a one size fits all approach. This is where, in my opinion, there will always be a shortfall if a person expects things to be balanced. But in my case combining them all...group, where I have accountability, camaraderie and respect among my peers. One-on-one...where I can explore all of the facets of what exactly is troubling me, together with an exercise program that pushes me to become stronger and healthier, along with a common sense approach to diet and the lifestyle choices I make, sure sounds like a winning formula. Now ALL I have to do is implement it and make it work for me. |
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