The Book of Masks (Vol. 3)

The Old College Try

Previously: "Schools of Thought" 

"Keyserling," you tell Caleb.

He stares at you, as though he hasn't heard you. Then his eyes pop. "The college?" he exclaims.

"Yeah. I—"

"Whoa! Cool! Yeah!" His eyes dance. "Patterson'd really go for that, that'd really get you—!"

He claps his hands together and raises them over his head, then dances in place. "And I know how to get you in!" he gasps. "Lucy!"

"Who?"

"Lucy, man! Cindy's sister! Don't fucking tell me you forgot Lucy!"

You had, in fact, but she comes back to you now. She was the head cheerleader your sophomore year, and like most everyone at the school you had a major crush on her. She had the same pale, strawberries-and-cream complexion as Cindy, but she seemed somehow riper, more succulent, more squeezable. And being Lucy Vredenburg—

"We could hang out more," Caleb chortles. "With me being Seth and you being her. Oh God, the sexual chemistry—"

"Bleagh!"

"Shut up. It'd be okay. We wouldn't actually— I mean, not unless you wanted to."

"Bleagh!"

"Alright, forget I said anything. But at least you could stop her being such a cunt to me."

"Is there anyone else?" For as inviting as Lucy Vredenburg is, Caleb has done a pretty good job of knocking down the attraction.

"Like who?" he asks with a frown. "Who else would you need to—?"

"Don't we know anyone else who goes out to the college?"

"No."

"Bullshit. Try thinking harder. Oh!" You snap your fingers. "What's their names, those dinks that Carson and James hung out with all last year and the year before?"

"Keith Tilley and Will Prescott?"

You show him both your middle fingers. "No. The tall doofus with the curly brown hair, and his friend— Justin! And, uh—"

"Oh! Connor and Justin."

"Yeah! What about them? We could get close to them."

Caleb looks skeptical. "If you want. But why would you wanna be a skinny goofball when you already are one?"

"Well, so, who do you think? Besides Lucy."

Caleb sucks on his lower lip and stares at the floor. You also search for possible names. Friends or acquaintances who have older siblings who go to the college.

"Mokichi," Caleb says. "Yumi's brother." You remember Mokichi as a senior two years older than you: a dark-haired kid with an intense stare, and as hard, slender, and sharp as a samurai blade.

"But then I'd definitely have to help Keith score a copy of Yumi," you point out, but Caleb only shrugs.

"There's also Charlie Russo," he says. You shake your head. "Something wrong with him?"

"I don't know him."

"Beefy guy, used to be on the lacrosse team. His brother Danny's on the team now."

"I'm not picking someone I don't know."

Caleb scratches the back of his head. "Then I guess that rules out Brownie Brown's brother."

"You mean wrestling-guy Brownie Brown?" you ask, and Caleb nods. "Is his brother anything like Brownie?"

"Even bigger."

"Oh, I know who you're talking about!" If it is guy you're thinking of, he's a mountain of muscle. "Yeah, maybe him." Then: "What's wrong?" you ask Caleb, for his eyes have gotten very big. "Hey man," you say when a giant grin breaks across his face. "You got something?" you ask when he sinks to his knees and raises his hands toward the heavens.

"It's perfect," he says. "It's gorgeous. It's a thing of beauty forever."

"It's not Chelsea Cooper, is it?" you ask. "Because Patterson told me—"

Caleb howls.

"No," he gasps, "but you're so close it's scary. It's Chelsea's brother!"

Chelsea Cooper has an older brother? you wonder.

"Think of it!" Caleb says in a choking voice. "You're living in the same house as Chelsea Cooper! You're her brother! Which means you get to drive her up the fucking wall!"

* * * * *

You and Caleb talk about it some more, and when you're done you have settled on a choice for yourself:

Next: "The Sister's Surprise" 

*
"Table of Contents (Vol. 3)" 
"The Book of Masks (Vol. 3)"