Once Upon A Shadow, Deep Inside A Dream

"Untitled" 1995

The trees call my name,
I cannot hide my shame.
The sea beckons to me,
calling, "Join me and finally be free."
I feel the cool foam,
then I realize that I roam.
Though there are friends all around,
there are no true friends to be found.
No one realizes my pain,
as I try to remain sane.
No one feels my fears,
no one sheds my tears,
no one hears their name,
as the untame,
sea calls to me,
"Come to me, I'll set you free."
Smiles all around,
though all eyes stare at the ground.
A step toward the sea,
I am ready to be free.
Darkness around me,
all eyes see.
A hand around either arm,
I hear alarms.
The sea begins to scream,
"Bring her back to me!"
Whispers in the dark,
the now fading dark.
No, no one feels my pain,
no one hears their name,
called by the sea,
"Come, I'll set you free."
Now there are true friends all around,
and now their eyes are on the ground.
But now I know why,
the ground is where I lie.

NOTE: (October 11, 2018) This poem was written when I was in high school and living with my father. It was written around 1995 on the same day I wrote the poem touch me not, leave me be. Interestingly enough, I loved (and still love) both these poems. Truly, as a sophomore in high school, these were the first dark poems I had written in my life. I was so proud of them! I showed them to so many people, including my dad. When my dad read this poem, he set down the paper very slowly and looked me in the eye and asked me if I was depressed. I denied being so, but I will say that I had experienced some trauma in my young life and so it makes sense that my mind would find darkness, and yes, I was most likely depressed.

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