trapped in a soap opera

I got fucked up and fucked up

well that pretty much says it. Got fucked up and did something that used to be normal for me but now im kinda upset about it and upset with myself. Went to memphis last night and got drunk as hell on vodka--yeah first mistake specially since i had been drinking wine all evening. Long story short i stayed at a friends house (which i have stayed at several times without incident) and ended up sleeping with him. OK so why am i upset with myself about this? #1 its ALWAYS a bad idea to sleep with your friend--just makes things a lot more complicated. #2 Its something i wouldnt have done sober--which i havent done something like that in a while. #3 I have been doing good about not randomly sleeping with ppl--almost made it a year with just 2. That used ot be odd for a weekend. #4 I had sex without protection--which i also used to be bad about--and havent done in over a year (excluding serious relationships)

So basically im stuck in a difficult place where i have to explain to my friend that i didnt relaly want to do it, and that i dont want it to happen again...

and i'm upset with myself for getting myself into this...for being irresponsible and for breaking rules that ive been doing good about keeping.

oh well--life goes on.