Story about God

30 May 2006 10:37pm

been a long time since i last wrote. i know it may not be very interesting and all but truth is stranger than fiction or something, so yup. yesterday i forgot how to write my sister's name. it sounds stupid but i did. and it made me feel sad. i know you dear reader may not want to read about depressing stuff like this- and you say "depressing?"
for some it may not be as sad as other stories rated as 'depressing' in life. and just because someone seems so cheerful and smiles on the outside, sometimes we forget what is on the inside, about who they live with and what they are going through when they are not with you or others.
its strange to think though, that one person may seem happy when they are really caught up thinking how life sucks. and when others say "you're always cheerful" and then that one person thinks "really, only of what you see." and maybe the person who said "you're always cheerful" feels sad too, like life sucks for them.
i am doing it again. rambling. trying to make sense. i know what is right and all these types of things go through my head everyday. its all up there but i wish i could let people know. i dont know what to write next. i dont really want to do research on the internet about bio-security in new zealand. i want to sleep. i want to finsh this first. i want to dream and let myself go in them, just to see where they lead. and i do know where they lead sometimes and what they mean. maybe i am just to afraid to tell how i interpret my dreams in fear of being wrong.

but how can we be wrong?

noone knows the truth. they think they do. even in class at school, they teach us theories. and yes we can argue against or for them, but most of the time we just write it down, believing what we are told. i dont want to be afraid of speaking about what i believe. i am not either i think.

i have been in my dream all day today. cant remember what it was about but thats alright. knowing things, seeing things that are to happen but not knowing that is what the meant.

thankyou for reading my rambles. perhaps next time it wont be so sad, even if you did not think of it that way...

:) goodnight! (or morning, depending on where you are in the world...)