Bloggin' Umholtz

Vol 37

Another volume of The Things I learned or almost learned has surfaced! It was found by three migrating pasta makers as they crossed the isthmus of Vermicelli. They had stopped for the night and were busy setting up camp when Pasta Maker Capelli D’Angelo felt the call of nature. While relieving himself he noticed a thin round tube extruding from the ground. Upon closer inspection he found that inside the tube was Volume 37. When they realized what they had they immediately contacted the research firm of E & Bay to explore financial compensation. Since the volume was incomplete it was the opinion of E that it should be returned to it’s original location in hopes that it would continue to grow. Bay felt that while that certainly was a viable option they should at least sell the tube which archeological metallurgists had determined was composed of the rare yellow metal called brass, (a strange combination of the elements Br and Ass) and offered the pasta makers a fair recompense of two bits. Excitedly they agreed.

VOL 37

1. Don’t sweat it, what you don’t get done today will wait until tomorrow.

2. If you don’t get it done tomorrow it probably didn’t need done in the first place.

3. Don’t ever steal tools. It just means you have to work.

4. If you can’t fix it with a sledge hammer and torch, its not worth owning.

5.Things under pressure go boom. This applies to balloons as well as people.

6. Listen closely: Crystal and beveled glass sun catchers as well as ornamental glass paperweights can concentrate sunlight (Think magnifying glass and ants).If you don’t believe me stop by my house and I’ll show you the wood burned furniture and the burn marks on the carpet. Do you understand?

7. Never leave a job unfinished.

8. ...

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Read my Blog!!!
You never know, you might be in it!

http://www2.Writing.Com/authors/joeumholtz/blog









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