My Blog

More Ranting on Exes

Went to Gabby's earlier to have a couple drinks in the air-conditioning and relax. My daughter's father comes in, sits down next to me, and almost immediately proceeds to try to talk me into giving him a "second chance". 15 years ago when I stopped giving him chances, he was already on like a 5th or 6th chance. Why he thinks things would magically work better 15 years later is beyond me.

He tried to use the excuse that it would be good for our daughter for us to be a family again. What? She's 18, almost 19 and going to college next year. What difference would it possibly make to her if we got back together? So, the moron keeps using her as his reason, insisting it would make her happy.

I called his bluff. Texted her asking what her reaction would be if her dad and I thought about getting back together. Her response? "I'd think you both went insane." That's my girl. Just the response I expected and hoped for. He wasn't too happy that she was on my side, but he should be used to THAT by now. She's a Packer fan like me, even though he tried to win her over to the Vikings all through her childhood.

When she was 3, I asked her how she would feel about it if her and mommy moved out and got their own place, but she could still see daddy anytime she wanted.

Her response, then? Jumping up and down excitedly and asking, "When are we moving?"

Don't get me wrong, she loves her dad. But, she's always been aware that he is an alcoholic. She remembers all the times he fell asleep while watching her and she couldn't wake him up. She remembers the fights he and I used to have. She's not stupid by any means. (4.0 gpa through high school)

So, yeah. He still couldn't understand why I didn't want to give him another chance after all this. I even told him a few times that I'm seeing someone, I'm happy, I have no desire to change anything.

His response? "I'm sorry to hear that."

Um, you're sorry to hear I'm happy? Well, good job. You now have made it even less likely that I would ever give you another chance, you selfish prick.

If you really love someone and they tell you they are happy, you are happy for them even if you are sad for yourself. Believe me, I know. I have loved my boyfriend for about 15-16 years now. I've been there. You don't rain on someone's parade if you love them. Even if it turns out in the end they were wrong and got hurt because they trusted the wrong person. You don't rub it in. You don't gloat. You genuinely feel sad that they were hurt....because that's what love is.