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Printed from https://shop.writing.com/main/books/entry_id/917785-Are-They-
Rated: ASR · Book · Cultural · #2015972
I have tried to summarize my observation with vivid and simple manner.
#917785 added August 18, 2017 at 1:10am
Restrictions: None
Are They ??
Men Are From Mars " And "Women Are From Venus"

In these times of spiritual enlightenment, equality and greater independence, the traditional viewpoint of roles in relationships between men and women have radically changed.

Roles of both men and women in society and in relationships were previously clearly defined. But this was based on a patriarchal society values dominated by men.

As we move into a new matriarchal golden age, women are becoming much more emancipated, independent, free thinkers and powerful.

While men are losing their grip on power, having to adjust and redefine themselves to the new age,of equality of the sexes.

The redefining of roles has also brought about confusion for both men and women, as the traditional rules have changed.

Men are having to adjust to be more empathetic to women's needs, as they express them more freely.

They also need to be more involved in family life, caring and raising children,housekeeping etc, as women are more often becoming equal breadwinners. Partly due to the average single salary no longer matches the needs of the family and women are, quite rightly,now geared to being far more career minded and independent breadwinners from the outset of their adult life.

Women, on the other hand, are also having to manage dual roles of running the family, having careers and increased independent social lives. Which has meant for them having to change their roles to compete equally with men socially, career wise in the business world as well take charge of the family, particularly if a single parent.

These changes in roles have completely redefined the dynamics of male / female relationships. Traditionally men and women think and act differently. i.e although some may say this is a generalization.

Brain Hemispheres

Many men are sharply left-brain dominant, while women tend to be more evenly balanced between left and right-brain processing. Women are, therefore, thought to be generally more intuitive, and sometimes better communicators. Men are often less socially adept, and are more project-oriented thinkers than females.

Men generally think in boxes. They have many boxes. Each has its own logical place and wired connections So a special woman in his mind has its own box, which he will open when and where it suits or stimulated. Men also have that secret box. - The "Nothing Box". It's man's favorite box. Why? Because he doesn't have to do anything in this box. It's his own comfort box. The "Nothing Box" can be incomprehensible to a woman, because she doesn't really have one, and perceives it's existence as a way for men to shut down and avoid her.

Woman asks the question:. What do you do in this "Nothing Box"? Man answers in irritation and dismay: "Nothing of course! " That's why it's called a "Nothing Box" !!!!"

So within the "Relationship Box" he has, he will make it as big or small, complex or simple, as he is able to cope with. If the woman he desires fits into the "Relationship Box" and its comforting, he will want to fill it up with more and give more.

Women brains are far more complex! There is a mass of wiring all connected together, all working at high speed, switching on and off, maybe ten or more, at any one single moment, multi-tasking..The wiring is either ordered or haywire, depending on her emotional and physical state. So with a "Relationship" there are many emotions, feeling and thoughts going on at one time, as well as dealing with every other aspect of her life. Men cannot comprehend this, as any attempt to do so would cause instant implosion. This irritates most men as they cannot understand why women need to think, feel so much.

Man asks question: "Whats the point of driving yourself and me crazy??" Woman answers: "You just don't understand do you?" Man answers: "Nope... There you go again!! " and thinks lets go back to my "Nothing Box", where it's safe.

Relationships

Women are purported to have better communication skills and emotional intelligence than men. Women tend to be group-oriented, and apt to seek solutions by talking through issues. Men can have trouble picking up on emotional cues unless they’re clearly verbalized – making for tricky communications between the sexes.

Woman generally like men who look and seem strong, yet caring, gentlemanly, a good smile and pretty teeth. Woman get aroused by a man's smell, be it his cologne perfume or simply his designer suits. They like sharp razor men, especially very clean good shoes! All women's eyes always roll down to a man's shoes upon meeting a man.They are very observant and catch all details on a man's face, while women wear their masks better and firmer.

Women don't like pushy men, that means making a woman do or feel uncomfortable to do, see or act. Basically caring is very important for a woman.

Men get an inferior complex with strong attractive women. Men will show strong confidence and have a mask on always, but once they see or meet a strong woman, the man often cant handle it. A strong woman means : She Feels good. Sees good, Hears good, Smells good! Tastes good! That scares most men. They have to overcome that fear to play in the fire.!

Basically its the five senses woman have in her. Don't mess with her! She is fire! Come too close one burns! Now to spot a strong woman is not easy either. Women are very good actors on stage!

Men universally crave women who stay light-hearted and relaxed. Especially when things get rough. Unfortunately this is very rare for a man to find, and it’s equally difficult for women to learn how to do this if they have a history of getting overly-emotional. If you lead with a sense of humor when things are not going well, it can instantly turn your love life around and spark emotional attraction again.

Men universally desire youthfulness in a woman. Youthfulness is an attitude. It consists of things like innocence and childlike energy, and this is something that stimulates men on a subconscious level.

Men like to see a woman being able to express positive emotions. body language that subconsciously tells all men that you’re irresistible and you know it.

Most women don’t understand that becoming emotional freaks most men out and causes them to close down out of fear. Most women try to “control” their emotions, but their emotions always come out sooner or later, whether directly through crying or anger, or indirectly through aloofness or other games.

Men are purpose and goal-oriented. They value the vision they want to create in life above all else. So when a man meets a woman, he secretly hopes that she will relax with his path, whatever that may be.

Physical beauty is the outward expression of the energy of femininity, which men are attracted to; This is why beauty is so powerful to men.

A smile tells a man on a gut level that you’re receptive and no smile says you’re “untouchable”.

A woman who is present, that he can look into her eyes and see that she is with him right here and now and not thinking about a million thoughts is highly attractive.

Men are drawn to women who live a life of love, positivity, joy, creativity and keeps worry or fear to a minimum. Unfortunately many women live in constant fear, worry, self-judgment, guilt and anxiety, due to negative experiences in life. A woman who is light-hearted, filled with love in her heart, is one of the most desirable qualities a woman can possess with men.

Game Play

A strong woman loves to play games. So if she rejects a man, but still wants him, he has to figure out the game play. Not easy as she makes up all the rules. A bit like Russian Roulette. Damned if you do. Damned if you don't . Hit the right button out of many and BINGO !

Men have fewer initiation buttons and most work. So there's a bigger chance of hitting the jackpot!

If a woman suspects that her significant other may be playing one on her, all is not lost. Mind games are played for many reasons. If she understands how and why he is pushing her, she will be able to play the player at his own game and come out ahead.

The first reason why a man might play them is just to test his woman—her love, loyalty, emotional capability, understanding, and intelligence.

A man may also play them when he really wants to obtain something from his significant other and knows that the only way he can make her consider doing it is by messing with her emotions. a real player.

These real players or masters of the game have recognized how vulnerable emotions can make people, and they are using this shortcoming to their advantage.Yet other men play games simply because another man may also be playing games or he knows it can be fun. Such a man may purposely stir the waters just to watch a woman react or become off balance.

Stress

When faced with stressful situations, men usually employ ‘fight or flight’ tactics, while women use a ‘tend or befriend’ response that is rooted in their natural instincts for caring for their children and establishing strong group bonds.

Men need their alone time. Men reduce stress by forgetting about their problems. It's sort of a mini-vacation. We all know how taking a vacation helps us forget our everyday problems. Interestingly, women reduce their stress by talking about their problems. So women need to understand that men need to reduce stress in a different way.

Emotions

Most women and men aren't clear about what they need and don't know that their primary needs are different; this lack of communication and awareness can cause emotional resentment.

Since women tend to have a larger deep limbic system than men, they’re more in touch with their feelings and are better at expressing their emotions. This makes women better at connecting with others, but unfortunately also more prone to different types of depression.

Men are generally more guarded with their emotions. Deep inside a man is a need that what he does has a positive impact on a woman. A man needs to feel that what he does has meaning and purpose.

So how can a woman help a man in her life in this area? A woman needs to show and express confidence and appreciation for the little and big things a man does. She should tell him that she appreciates how hard he works, that she appreciates his assistance in the home. Criticism simply drains a man of feeling trusted. Appreciation fulfills a man's sense for meaning and purpose. When a man knows his efforts are appreciated, he's naturally encouraged to do more.

Men's independence and isolation sometimes leads to women feeling emotionally abandoned.A woman's primary emotional needs are caring, understanding and respect. A woman needs to educate her man on what her primary emotional needs are in a positive way so she feels cared for and like a priority. It's the time together that's most important to a woman.

Women often feel that they're giving and giving and giving, and aren't getting enough back. They ask, "So why should I meet his needs?" Men often feel, "I'm doing so much for her and all she does is complain." Men can then give up, believing that nothing makes her happy.

It can be truly difficult to understand and accept our partner's different set of emotional needs. Men and women need education on these differences to help their relationships.

Sexual

When referring to sexual attraction, everything starts from the mind!

Men have as much as 20 times more testosterone in their systems than do women. This makes men typically more aggressive, dominant and more narrowly focused on the physical aspects of sex.

Traditionally, with men testosterone drives the "Man Trance"-- that glazed-eye look a man gets when he sees breasts for example. Women may wish that they say that men can stop themselves from entering this trance. But the truth is, they can't. Their visual brain circuits are always on the lookout for fertile mates. Whether or not they intend to pursue a visual enticement, they have to check out the goods.

To a man, this is the most natural response in the world, so he's dismayed by how betrayed his wife or girlfriend feels when she sees him eyeing another woman. Men look at attractive women the way women look at pretty butterflies. They catch the male brain's attention for a second, but then they flit out of his mind. Five minutes later, while the wife or girlfriend are still fuming, he's deciding whether he wants ribs or chicken for dinner. He asks them, "What's wrong?" and the woman says, "Nothing." He shrugs and turns on the TV. The woman smolders and fears that he'll leave her for another woman.

He also considers he must act masculine and be more dominant in his approach towards women.

In men, the dominant perceptual sense is vision, which is typically not the case with women. All of a woman's senses are, in some respects, more finely tuned than those of a man.

Women are not, in the main, turned on by pictures of nudes . . . Women may be aroused by pictures of couples coupling. Because what they are seeing, in however sterile a sexual context, is a relationship in action. Women are not excited by a picture of male genitalia by itself . . . Men like female genital close-ups in porn magazines because it is a thing to which they can imagine doing things to. Sex for men is vastly impersonal. Pornography is simply meat for men. Do they ever wonder who the nude is? Not for a moment. They wonder what they would do to her.

Men want sex, and women want relationships. Men want flesh and women want love. Just as boys wanted balloons, toys, and carburetors, the girls have always wanted contact, communion and company.

The female mind is organized to place priority on relationships, the male on achievement. Men keep a tally of their sexual conquests. The female brain is not organized to keep sex in a separate compartment. This is a male model. As if his brain has a specific filing cabinet for sex, completely unrelated to emotion.

Women, too, are excited by visual erotica, although women are not as turned on by it as men are. Women are much more aroused than men by romantic words, images, and themes in films and stories. Women's sexual fantasies include more affection and commitment.

Women often dwell on their own emotional reactions. And they are more than twice as likely to think about a sex partner's emotional characteristics. . . . Flowers, oils, candlelight, satin sheets, fluffy towels: When women fantasize about sex, they conjure up the textures, sounds, and smells, all of the ambiance surrounding sex, more regularly than men. Women also like more kissing, hugging, stroking, and cuddling during sex. In short, women place the act of intercourse within a wider physical context.

Sexual Orientation

In these enlightened times, sexual orientation is no longer clearly defined. The rightful liberation of gay, lesbian, transsexuals etc. within society, has also brought new dynamics to relationships and interaction within couples, families, work and social life. But is has also brought confusion into the soup of traditional roles between men and women. Some people don't really know who they are anymore.

In Summary

The issue in these changing times of enlightenment, from patriarchal to matriarchal society values, is that there is a greater expectation for men to act and think or at least be more considerate of women's ideals.

And as women are becoming more independent, liberated and career minded are having to adopt more traditionally masculine ways of thinking and acting.

Both women and men need to understand, relate to and interact differently when they think and act in terms of relationships. It is not simply a case of saying or acting like "You don't understand me" and then a parting of ways. It's a case of "We might not understand each other, but we are willing to try use all our senses, understand the "boxes", the "complex wiring", the "nothingness", "the fullness" etc etc, for a united path of love and respect for our differences and similarities."

Communication stops between husband / wife, boyfriend / girlfriend, because there is no LOVE only assumptions, judgement and selfishness.

Hence, one might say, where as "Men are from Mars " and "Women are from Venus" and neither do the twain meet . Now "Men are from Mars trying to be Venus" and "Women are from Venus trying to be Mars" and everyone is even more confused.

At some point when levels of human consciousness polarity raises to a higher level of spiritual enlightenment and oneness,. "Mars" will converge with "Venus" a Ying Yang Convergence.

Love is the core to heart !

Love that stays strong flows, all emotions flow together, e.g : faith, love, kindness, humbleness.

With love you are full! Like after a delicious meal! Love is what keeps people together by feeling love in heart ! Love is not just saying "I love you" to your partner !

Simply - Love is - Feel it, Taste it, See it, Share it !!!!

"We all come alone and go alone

Karma makes you meet / greet / actions !

So do good, see good, be good.

Love ever. Hurt never. Love all. Serve all"

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Printed from https://shop.writing.com/main/books/entry_id/917785-Are-They-