Evolution of love

AN HONEST DISCUSSION ABOUT SEX

AN HONEST DISCUSSION ABOUT SEX

DISCOVERING THE DEEPER LONGING IN IT

Hi Reinhard,

Friend: I feel a tremendous pull towards sexual tendencies. It was present in me since i was like 6 or 7. I am 39 now and i feel it has become like a strong wire now...and am unable to break it. How can we be vigilant against emotions and habits which have become automatic. I have been trying and always find it coming with tremendous force.

R: Yes, i understand. Buddha is quoted that if there had been a second power equal to sex he wouldn't have succeeded. So you are not alone. But we must understand that we cannot force it by sheer will power because the emotions are stronger and the will is actually moved by them. Then how to find peace and responsibility with it?
The first step you have done by being honest about it. That attitude can face facts without apologizing and covering up. Inquiry becomes possible. So ask yourself whether you can face the whole process openly, observing with understanding and warmth, not from fear.
As long as you want to force a emotion, it will hit back. What does any emotion, including sexual desire, really seek? If you could ask that feeling directly, what do you think would be the reply?

Friend: Satisfaction...release.

R: Release, relaxation, yes, that is what is never lastingly fulfilling, right? That is why you experience it as suffering. That means, the desire is not truly satisfied for long, right? Can you observe what part your mind plays in the whole game?

Friend: Yes true..it is never lasting but then after some time there is Same buildup and same action
It's an intense feeling which i find difficult to observe.

R: Can you understand that you haven't reached the true longing of that emotion? Perhaps you do not perceive it deeply enough? What is it you want THROUGH that physical process? What does your heart seek through it?

Friend: It's purely physical pleasure.

R: That is your mistake. Because you cannot see the deeper longing in it you limit it to the physical sexual sensations.

Friend: Understand.
Maybe i have to he more vigilant when it sets in.

R: Only Love can fulfill. Where is love contained in your sexual activity?

Friend: It's more selfish and mechanical.
Since childhood I feel aroused by visually seeing women. Their body parts...it is more pleasurable than the act of sex
I picked this up quite early.
I did see my parents having sex when i was a toddler.

R: It is only the limiting to these areas that calls for more attention. Sex is a part of the Kundalini, a Divine energy to find true peace and our Home. Start to observe the process with love and understanding and you will find a natural way to live with it. Neither suppression nor indulgence are satisfying. Seek a partner and live with love.

Friend: Thanks Reinhard.
Yes, I follow.
The habit needs to be understood and outgrown.

R: Try it and report when you have more questions.