%%USERNAME%%    %%ACCWORDS%% %%ONOFF%% |
 All that remains: in afterlife as 'mainstream' blogger, with what little I know. 20k views |
|
Obshchak Some torn to the ground ▼ Read here some old blog entries...  2018 Highlights ▼Brian K Compton   -- ![Merit Badge in Second Time Around Contest
[Click For More Info]
Congratulations on winning the Grand Overall Prize in [Link To Item #2164876] with your beautiful poem, [Link to Book Entry #933358]. This poem really moved me. Great writing!
Rachel *^*Heartv*^*](https://images.Writing.Com/imgs/writing.com/writers/badges/group-Second_Time_Around_Contest-2164963_14.gif) Short answer, mostly relatable. |
| George Carlin surprised me in the early 80s with a revelation during one of his standup specials, I think on HBO. Thanks to cable he didn't have to self-edit about how angry and disturbed he could get. He was a comic genius who could also be quite silly, but I always imagined comics to be funny. There wasn't another side to that coin. And what he helped me realize was humor can come from rage and deep-seated feelings that need construction expression to fully realize and relate to others who feel the same way but cannot express it. It was about this time I was also discovering Richard Pryor and his rage. Comics we're opening up about how they felt and how society was affecting them. Perhaps, the origins of self-discovery and pop psychology are partly rooted in standup comedy from this era. I listen to Carlin relate that his entire day would be ruined if he tripped over a crack in the sidewalk. My mind was blown. I was partially sad to see this side of him and thrilled that the two of us shared a commonality We could get so easily upset about the smallest of things. It might be that we are deep in thought and prefer not be disturbed. The disconnect from our inner processes are startled by simple incidents like this. It could be a child gently asking for a father's attention while busied with writing streams of thought into an internet portal, as my case in recent years. But when I was experiencing Carlin's revelations, I was insecure around other young adults and just wanted to put on my best appearance. I didn't want to be the subject of ridicule or shame because someone saw me accidently acting a boob by walking into a door. Carlin taught me not to take myself so seriously and learn to laugh at my mistakes, though I doubt he took a cue from his own missive. I think he was just deconstructing what made him so intense, which leant to his comic genius and a wordsmith in his own right. The whole approach to standup comedy was becoming observations of the world, the human condition. It was searching for irony in the way we are humanly constructed to live with shame, to preen and put on our best appearances rather than show ourselves warts and all. Where it was once funny to laugh at people slipping on banana peels, I developed a sense of self-deprecating humor. Here I walk into an internet community wanting to divulge the best parts of myself and play upon it because it can be so loving and rewarding. But, when you fall short of expectations and true goals, a writer can have adverse reactions to it. It is a world just like any other that feeds off shame and insecurity to manipulate those emotions, to either nurture or reject accordingly, however it fits in the plan. Social media; bunch of narcissists. I cannot even imagine a world inside Instagram; and I value my image, my self-worth enough to know where not to reside within walls of indifference. My son, easily accepts these internet living conditions where he will find himself, but cannot find a real world where he can get his course work done and pass his classes to move on to his junior year. He would have gotten academically booted to the curb if not for a pandemic. He is facing humiliation because he could not express the number of times he kept tripping over the same place in the walk, even though family and school stood at the ready to help and support him. So, today, I doubly fail. First as a parent, which I will live with until this somehow turns around. But second, as a resident of the internet. I trip and trip and trip and smile. I could do a cartwheel at the end, but no one would give a rat's behind. Maybe, I intimidate or piss people off when I get too intense. My goals, my expectations unmet cause me to stew and think I deserve better, and I do. I can't get accepted as I am, because I'm no George Carlin. I have not found an arena for my ability to advance myself and thrive. And, it's all because I hold back. I learned from Carlin to laugh at myself. But, I also learned not to try. I don't put myself out there to fail, because I never feel supported or ready to try. With enough evidence returning from a world that doesn't appreciate my hostility and how it's revealed, I'm unworthy of further foray. I feel like being a cog in the surrounding systematic indifference applied, rather than a finely oiled thing that could keep this machination inside the internet moving. I burn to be the thing that smokes and smolders within a negated existence that offers phony platitudes and 'thank you for not smoking' warnings. People need hear hard truths the way Carlin revealed them to me. I'd say that's the end, for now. To be edited later. 5.24.20 My apologies to my son who I am trying to support. I'm taking blame for his situation. But, it's time he take ownership of his own mistakes and start being a man. This is probably just the first of my blog entries revealing feelings about manipulation and corruption on the internet. |
| I sometimes wonder if I should write an explanation with every poem I write. I shouldn't have to, right? Except, this is a perfect opportunity to help reviewers deconstruct what they are seeing, what they are missing. I have seen reviews that meander. They try to offer input and perhaps pick up on something that they think they understand and misinterpret and the whole review goes south. I feel sorry for them that I cannot give them more to go on. Perhaps, they are not up for the challenge of decrypting poetry such as some of the stuff I offer, when I'm really trying to stretch my wings. I also suspect reviewers are not as much concerned with processing what they are reading, but try to sound like they know something. Perhaps, some are just getting their reviews in and the focus is just satisfying some goals. Whatever reason, these motivations are put in place to increase interactions, I suppose. I think it would help both of us, but mostly the reviewers here. I see poets who seem very knowledgeable offer feedback that over-interprets or just assumes that I'm just throwing a bunch of hoo-ha at the screen, like I'm laughing maniacally while they attempt to sound intelligent revealing their high brow reactions. Listen, I'm not even the best interpreter of poetry. I don't want to judge. I look around and I see what's offered and I know where I stand. This is an opportunity for many to learn and that includes me, but not foremost. I sometimes wonder if there is an agenda for some. I know we have a past and I see the players change but not the attitudes, so I'm not sure why sometimes I get the words and expressions sent my way. I am sending very little back on my end, being courteous and generous in my cordial response. I offer very good reviews for some, when I'm hitting my stride. Does the community need me, or want that from this writer/reviewer? I'm puzzled by my underwhelming welcoming here. I get the 'oh no, we appreciate you Brian' line from time-to-time. It's tiring, but I don't care. I came here to develop as a writer 13 years ago, without or without the help of an audience of observers that are mixed to barely existent. I realize what your agenda is, your prerogative. It's questionable at best. I'm not the morality police. So, take a cue to learn something here like I do. I've evolved. I think it's a great chance for other members to see the value in true content. And, that's as nice as I can put it. (of course, I can't stop typing...) I also predict a very sunny morning for more writers who will do this community proud. Meanwhile, overcast with a chance of 13 more years of darkness here, but I don't really care about your systematic segregation. Anything I achieve here, I know I worked for and earned. But, you don't really believe that, because it doesn't benefit some of you. Where is the silver lining in our relationship and why haven't you acknowledged it's true value? Am I cog? I must be a cog. Don't know what I am to you really, because you 'employ' indifference in the upper ranks. I might add, all you liberals out there, I know you to be some of the biggest hypocrites. Nope, I'm not the morality police. Nope, but I said. Sooooo...yeah, gonna let my hat hang on that because I also have a bug up my butt about being true...to myself, I suppose. Whoever is offended by this shouldn't be, unless they must know they are guilty of something. Are some of you guilty of something, I wouldn't point fingers. I'm just very aware. |
As opined in newsfeed, but probably not seen by the masses.  I've probably done four to five thousand reviews here. But, I don't think I'll ever actually know how many, because people have to delete items to fit within their portfolio parameters. Or, just all out delete their account for whatever reasons. I don't feel I have that review feather fully stick in my cap. Not that anyone goes out of their way to see the effort that it takes/has taken to provide review content. But, it's like taking four to five thousand essay exams, where you don't want to mail in a 'C' effort because people/professors are watching. Plus, you have the added pressure of knowing the real authors see what you offer, and you respect them enough to really try understand and comment with a measure of intelligence the assembled words they need or want to hear. I even forget myself to fully comprehend what it takes for just one other member to stroll over and gander at what I share. If they review, it's a blessing. The amount of effort I see from some either really comes from a source of higher experience or a true desire to fully commit to feedback. Either way, I think reviewing as a writing medium at this website is likely undervalued. But, the act of reading and responding is the true reward. I just know when I reread my old reviews, what I can still obtain in my port, it helps build my reviewing skills and gives greater perspective. Appreciate reviews. When related items are gone, they're gone. "Note: I've probably done four to five thousand revie..." If you also find sitewide activities alluring and engrossing that you lose all ability to perceive space and time, you might be a writer desperate for some attention to your ability to construct words eliciting response from peers. I commented on Tina Stone's newsfeed thread about her good fortune following the misfortune of deleting many activity files. It was more in response to Alyssa, a faithful follower and word junkie, who felt like she was mailing in her activity posting efforts: "Chibithulu (Alyssa)  ,I wouldn't begrudge you for the truncated content, because I image these events are designed to be time consuming for whatever reason. We all have lives to live and personal goals to attain as writers foremost. I see the activities as useful as long as it keeps us within target of our own goals and not astray. In fact, so tedious is it to fully comprehend and comply with multiple activity rules and guidelines, let alone the time it takes to commit to ideate and write, I just step away. I know we need traffic and activity to keep this site hopping, but I have seen a lot of burnout. It's good folks find fun things to do here. Unfortunate that I see so much resignation of true goals in the process. God bless you all for trying to keep us entertained.  See, I was nice.  But to further my point about traffic, I wonder if a great opportunity to take advantage of a captive audience was missed. I saw the efforts to inform and direct people to participate here, post-pandemic awareness in the states. In about that time frame, I've witnessed Writing.Com traffic numbers fall off sharply for the month after its peak on March 4th (per Alexa.Com free traffic stats). Activity has continued to slowly drop in the time since. I'm certain that this is a seasonal effect, nonetheless. However, when you consider that people were essentially sequestered, around the world mind you, it's possible whatever efforts may have been made to drive traffic may have missed the mark. I can't speak to it with any authority other than as someone who stands in the shadows, watches and has learned over thirteen years as mainly a sideline participant. I see strategies and types of members who are drawn here, cultivated as preferred members and moderators to do whatever it is they do to help WDC thrive. Some really good people trying to do really saintly-type stuff. I know that there are some that buy in. The result to me is there is not a lot of worthy content floating about for people floating through the internet streams to discover. Unfortunate. I'm old timer. I've seen better days. I'm sure it's no ones fault. I'm not criticizing. I'm trying to just be that bellwether in the storm, just one of the indicators to help with someone who is inclined with any prognosticating ability. Ship's off course a might. I should shut up, right? Send the PR consultant over to have a talk with me about my blog content. Are you sure? Listen, there are billions of websites around the world. You got lucky on the domain name and it is likely the diving rod that draws a mecca. But, it's not holding anyone here. If you look at the dead sea of cases and wonder why they lie about in purgatory, inactive, and think of the potential of retention. This could be a much greater force in the writing world, community. Perhaps, those at the helm do not have the necessary sea legs to captain such a mighty vessel. Wow, I'm going with this> Yes, this site has great potential. Some say it's antiquated. But look at the name of the side of this listing ship that cannot possibly capsize and know you are safe here. It might not be aimed for high ground and it might not have the best meals or food and you could get sick, throw up overboard, may jump overboard, but it will keep drawing passengers. It has the capacity for so many more. It could have so many rooms more to explore with really good entertainment you could come back for night after night. But, this is what you get mid pandemic. This is the menu and these are the activities you can expect. Shuffleboard! No, that was an exclamation. I went on to long Oh, shuffleboard! I love you all. I'll return to my cabin and wait further instruction. Or, worse, remain below deck with no one to talk to. Aye, aye, cappy! he exclaimed.  That's me blowing off air after that long exortation.I'm not going to check grammar, spelling or word definition at this point. I'm a big boy. I know my English good. |
Review of "Societies Nature"  "Societies Nature"  Review of "Tanka Poem on Pollen" "Invalid Item" Review of "Dusk" "Dusk" Review of "Pick Me" "Pick Me"   Thank you so much for your honest review and your advice. sincerely, |
| Today, is Jen's first day out of isolation from the Coronavirus. It has been 72 hours without major symptoms, which means she can go back to work. But according to of the county health department, the rest of us have to quarantine at home for the next two weeks. That's going to make it difficult for a few upcoming appointments. I have to reschedule the dentist for my daughter and I. But questions surrounding testing me for the virus before shoulder surgery with my current quarantine are going to make it interesting. I am going to be coming out of Quarantine on the 18th and on the 19th I am scheduled for surgery, tentatively. Part of the problem is, they will need to do a coronavirus test for me going in and then having to quarantine for three days prior to surgery. With me home self quarantining during that time I wouldn't be able to come in three days early, so they're talking about testing me right away to show that I don't have the virus so I don't have to further quarantine another week to two weeks and reschedule that surgery if somehow I test positive. So, the left shoulder tear is the result of an injury I suffered over 25 years ago and have just lived with because it has not hindered me. However, I did use yoga about 10 years ago and got further mobility out of it and basketball helped, too. It's time had come, especially with this worldwide shutdown. A lot of contact sport and usage caused the rotator cuff to become so deteriorated I could barely reach out to pick up something off my nightstand without pain. I knew it was time. And what they discovered is a 1 cm x 2 cm tear all the way across. I luck out once again by having the right doctor for my surgery. First time, on my right shoulder, I had the best rotator cuff specialist probably in the state. They said it was like repairing a major league pitcher's arm. And now with my aging, I am fortunate to have a Sports Medicine specialist who would do a surgery on tear as large as mine, despite. The other doctor would've told me to just live with it. My wife is telling me horror stories about how much harder this is going to be for me to recover from this, versus the first shoulder repair. But this is not a dominant arm, and I don't think that I have to get as full a range of motion from it. I think she thinks that there's gonna be a high pain factor because, but she forgets I have a high pain tolerance. She had me taking too many meds. I was acting weird on here post surgery in late 2013, early 2014. I sometimes laugh at what I wrote, though I did snag first place in the Dear Me contest in January that year, somehow, against great odds. I'm suspecting greater than 90 to one, if you catch my drift. So, okay then. 5.5.20 |
| See you next fall? https://www.msn.com/en-us/news/politics/convinced-fauci-says-there-will-be-coron... you had me at: "(a group of scientists and billionaires with a backdoor plane to advise president Trump) describe their work as a lockdown-era Manhattan Project..." https://www.msn.com/en-us/news/us/the-secret-group-of-scientists-and-billionaire... |
My daughter and the girl in the plastic bubble are listening to vinyl tonight. Right now, playing song we sang to her at bedtime when she was little: Listening to the high parts now. I was the only one who dared sing that part. Life will be normal again. Making new and special memories. It’s the dawn of a new era. When these 14 days of captivity are up, I want to get a video of her climbing up the back stairs to the garage like a miner exiting a shaft trapped by a cave in. But that would be insensitive to those who’ve been through that very real life or death drama, except I don’t know them. And, they’ve never heard of me. So, the only people who could be offended are people who just take offense on behalf of those not available to witness. And yet, this is a real life drama. This does factor life and death. This is about sacrifice and a family kept apart. I will have my video. But, I’m seriously worried she’ll just run right upstairs to her Waterpik. (CURRENT PHOTO NOT AVAILABLE) Instead, I give you this:  Three days in partial captivity. Bring my wife and our mother home! We’re hungry. Serious, nothing to eat except cereal. |
| Put your acorns where your mouth is? Collect as much of those acorns as you can now before this forthcoming recession (more willing to call it depression now?) arrives... https://apple.news/Am1N1UWv1STqruHLssGERqw Before inflation affects grocery prices and other needs (fortunately oil war caused cheap gas), get your ducks in a row for more TP shortages and things we don't have the imagination to realize flying off store shelves. Expect inflation and price gouging. Expect more fledgling stores and companies to go under...Kmart, Sears types. Because Amazon is king, followed by Walmart, Costco and Target. https://apple.news/AejaFUKbjSrGnfe2OLmZyqw The more we get comfortable with online shopping and vactioning indoors, streaming live stuff from movies to games to each other, the more local communities are likely to suffer. Trump will have a hell of a time in coming months reacting to fickle Wall Street, if it doesn't do him in. Or...we come out of this stronger and more resilient than ever. https://money.com/fed-bazooka-your-budget/ What you got your money on...sorry, acorns? I'm not a professional doomsday prepper, but I have two cabins in the woods I can flee to. We can drop a thousand gallon fuel tank in ground and get an oil company over with a truck to fill it up with cheap crude. We got weapons and ammo and plenty of wildlife for survival. I don't think my kids are ready for a world without wifi...out of necessity rather than it not being available. They don't use it now to complete their homework, so forget them man. Let's eat a squirrel and leave a squirrel in the woods. TP reference. Still at top of food chain. Come on Wall Street. Don't screw this up for the rest of us who don't want our money tied up in bonds again or for eternity. |
| Okay, Wall Street closes higher again. I've got my broker on speed dial to get me out of the market if this thing nose dives again. Value of my portfolio is almost back to where I want it. The value of bonds is rising. Thankfully investors are more hopeful for our future amid this pandemic. I think that's because the worst of it may be over in major cities. Now mid to small size areas more remotely located are feeling the brunt, like here in Green Bay. Why am I posting this in newsfeed? I just started typing and now this thing is getting long. Financially, things are looking up for investors. It's getting people back to work and back into arenas to enjoy leisure that is going to take awhile. This is a rollercoaster ride for sure. I need to secure my investments and not lose another 30% of my portfolio value. So, i'll see how fickle market will be in days, weeks and months to come. You know, most trading is done by computers that are programmed to react to market conditions. I'm in some hedge funds that rely on this, and between my wife and I are over 70% reliant on stocks. I went to all bonds in 2008 and pretty much dove back into the market the day after Trump was elected. I pulled out most of my portfolio to fund an annuity one year ago. I can start drawing on that in seven years, if I chose.Three years away from no mortgage payment. Most people live from paycheck to paycheck, I hear. Unemployment checks are still not arriving. And the government stimulus lump sums got here, but the additional federal money for unemployment is still months away. Lots of information about this unusual time in history to take in and consider. Are they driving the market up unnecessarily to get investors a false security before another major sell off? Corporations still doing buy backs like pharmaceuticals who would rather own their own stock to control price rather than spend more money on research. Well Wall Street investors don't have all the control, because what drives economy is the consumers ability to spend. If there is no place to drive our cars to but grocers, and everyone is getting the virus at meat packing plants, and not enough money to spend, where will we be months from now? Even if we wind up with extra dough. You can't even bet on sports. I have a few stock tips. Just bet on Amazon, Walmart, Costco and Target to name a few, because they are set up well to deliver goods. Leisure on the internet is growing. Look at Zoom. They are creating playrooms now. Imagine, we all could be Zooming or playrooming all at once. Too much unknowable yet about that. But, but some industries are popping up out of this. Eating at home is getting easier. As is buying goods over internet. More people will order from home in the future, as people grow accustomed. Well, you could bet on the market with an online app and make a few bucks. I just do it because I'm bored. Just to show my financial advisor I can outinvest him. I might or I might not. Okay, i'm taking this to my blog. Edit later. |
| Well this is surreal. Wife exposed on late shift to Covid19 admitting patient today. A person she identified as a co-worker was the passenger in car that pulled up to emergency center. Jen is covering there, because no elective surgery for a trained tech. The woman was getting out, started passing out and threw up on ground, missing my wife. Jen didn't have an n95. Even if she had, it wouldn't correctly fit her face. She's tried in past. They were not prepared for this arrival. People are supposed to call ahead before being seen, or arrive by ambulance. Wife and a nurse were exposed, lacking proper garb for such an extreme case. She's home now. I worked into night to get her bunker ready. A shower curtain separates us on the lower house level. Jen gets a mattress on floor with dresser, small fridge, adjacent bathroom and access to garage. We figured 14 days for the girl in the plastic box-room. My daughter who needs mom most nights is being angsty, where I'm offering comfort. They are constantly thick as thieves. It will be an adjustment...for all. She can't get tested, even as hospital employee. You get sent home until your symptoms are bad. Let's pray that doesn't happen. 🙏 |
Pulled a few oldies from the mothballs, brushed off, polished a bit. Sometimes, perspective informs a writer growing to decide where this journey is leading by rediscovering the past. Is it so unknowable?
written in my last year of college, forced through so many English courses on my way to earning my degree. even then, I was nostalgic for the past, whether I could grasp moments of time escaping to hold onto, much like a good film that you wish would never end. today we have binge-watching episodically like morons, still unsated. when does it stop? when will we accept our own mortality? it's never going to be as good as some shining, pearl vision perfectly captured on film. live it raw and rough and appreciate we cannot ascend to high ideals...and write the damn novel! that's just me yelling at myself. yell at your own self instead making me do it.
I added a footnote to this old poem when I stored it today to my own files. I'm preparing to trim the bushes and hedges in this web place. Too many static items from the past that have no place here now. The above poem was written in my early 20s. That much I can tell you. My mastery of the English language was better than the people I was hanging out with, before I went to college...finally. And, I got smarter. Not that anyone's looking in at my blog posts, or even commenting, but I won't overwhelm with links for the time being. I'm in a different place after this past year, showing me that we got to wind this thing down. I'm not a good fit for this community. |
| Let me just say, I'm learning Coronavirus is making a lot of people crazy. It's understandable to run with emotions over testing/reporting and health care concerns, as I wrote to someone dealing with an inadequate medical provider: "That's quite an ordeal. Glad you're both doing better. My wife screens people here in Green Bay for the virus. She's had her concerns about her own exposure to patients eventually testing positive. She's calmer now, too. You're a great mom. I think the medical community starting with World Health Organization down to leaders on every level are taking their lumps now and well into the future for not being prepared for this. Experts are saying stay calm. Flattening the curve is about not overwhelming the health care system, because they need to prioritize care now. Hopefully, you'll continue to get better. Your body's immune system is key. That hospital could inflict more damage than good going to those ventilators, if they have enough for critical patients. If you can self-manage, you'll have a better chance getting through this. They only want to take you, if you cannot sustain yourself. Results in areas like yours can take a week, because they don't have their own testing facilities. I'll pray for you and your community. Hopefully, the best medicine is just being at home. Keep yourself entertained. Three more weeks? We can do this. We can laugh, this is our trial run for the apocalypse. Laugh. Cry, too. It's all good for you. And, write more. It helps with critical thinking and keeping our wits about us, at times when our brain wants to go into these fight or flight modes. It's normal. Best Love..." All we can do is support one another, learn as we go as is the medical community. My wife introduced me to this guy. He might have a handle on how to cope and reflect on the situation we're in... https://www.facebook.com/ZDoggMD/videos/237602127604975/ |
| It's too early for I told you so. Let's get past this week... https://apple.news/AEeJso10-TYy0710gM1t1mQ When called upon, corporations all the way down to the littlest people are supporting our country...because it is great. |
| It's not uncommon for us to always say we'll get to it later… ...The novel. And during this pandemic that has affected the entire world, like our English speaking portion of it, it would behoove us to spend our extra time while in captivity crafting that elusive beast into existence. Should have struck while the iron was hot, although I don't think it would've done any good because I would've reached this moment… ...The virus invades our life in our sweet little cubby of a home, on a cul-de-sac in the suburb of a semi-rural town in northern Wisconsin. No, none of us that we know of have been infected by COVID-19. But, right now I am preparing a bunker for my wife who is on the front lines checking people in at the hospital who suspect their symptoms might lead to a positive diagnosis of the disease. Right now, she needs reassurances from me that I will be ready to step up for her at the helm of this family to make sure things go smoothly, should she be infected by this disease. We've had some candid conversations about it since she started taking shifts again last week at her hospital. She fulfills an obligation to cover her hours, since elective surgery doctors cannot operate right. It never got more real for her, until three days ago, when the hospital chaplain arrived suffering from obvious symptoms. She had to approach his car and talk to him and get him off to nurses and staff who could situate him. She watched the Chaplain's wife drive away, after the couple had briefly talked and hugged. When she got home that night, it hit her. My seldom emotional wife Was choked up by the sudden realization -- it might have been the last encounter for those two. Two days later, he went into the ICU unit. What does this mean now for us? Well, after talking to Jen about the chances she might actually get coronavirus, her outcome doesn't look good. She wants to make sure she doesn't pass this on to the rest of us. Fortunately, we have a medical professional in the house who knows how to scrub and keep clean and safe and to avoid cross-contamination. She's not confident her hospital can adequately provide her protection, minus a PAPR mask. Her current mask that looks like a beekeeper hood in inadequate. She feels there is an 80% chance she will contract this. I have to be ready to step up. I am in the process of setting up a room in our lower level that's connected to a bathroom. I have to clean it out entirely, sort out, box up, and move stuff to other locations of our home or garage. I have to make it comfortable with a bed and other amenities, because this poor woman (who is on the front lines helping people through this crisis) might have to reside in a 10x10 secluded space by our back entry to garage. She will depend on a dreamer, the most ignorant and foolish person in the world to take care of her and our family if she should go down. I'm actually capable of this task, because when presented with a situation like this, I respond. My back is not against the wall yet, so I'm dragging my feet and sitting here writing this opus...for good reason. I'm trying to process how this is all going to play out, if I have to roll into action. Obstacles. Both of my kids have been spending a lot of time in distraction with video games, social media -- distracting themselves with things on the Internet. Unfortunately, they have not been focusing on their homework for his college or her high school. And, there has been some fluctuating stress in this house about that, especially concern from my wife. And me, dopey dad, with aww shucks mentality, because no one ever listens when he instructs, has to step up and be a leader -- in a situation where I've been diminished in my household by people who don't want my opinion. I don't have a voice... until I hear someone say what does dad think and look up and realize I should've been listening. Well, I'm ready now -- a chance to prove I can be depended on, to see me in a different light. I am actually a strong-willed person with drive, once given keys to take this thing out of park. Problem is, got a cab full of backseat drivers. Now I can shush them, let me do this. So, once I get over that mental mountain, I have to deal with the reality that my wife could be sitting at home with a disease with potential five percent mortality rate. Obviously, if it becomes bad, she won't be living in her house. But, she also doesn't fall into the range or age of people dealing with a fatal situation. So, mortality rate is going to be around 1%. What about me? I told her that if I get COVID-19, I am prepared. I don't feel my life is significant that it should be preserved, so willing to be on front line for her through this. She asked, what about your family? And I said they can get by without me. I'm more of an obstacle. It's morbid, I know. And the chances that either one of us will be greatly affected by this virus is yet unknown, doesn't feel like a real thing (for me) just yet. But, we're preparing. My greatest obstacle is educating my children about this concern and how they can step up themselves and contribute to the process, instead of being lumps in their own beds until after noon every day, without ever accomplishing the simplest of tasks. If they could just pull their own weight, they could ease tension of their parents to better focus or handle impending events likely to unfold. That basement is calling. It needs my attention. |
| Review of "The Question Box" For "Could President Donald Trump become a king?" Hi, This was fun. Too bad. You know, it lines up. But, we would find a reason to go to war with anyone who might try to apply pressure on us to pay. And while our country may have lost favor with countries since President Trump, we are the world's protector. We are the mafia, yes! We put military installations in countries worried about their own defenses, and that speaks louder than money. Patriotism is what keeps us strong. China can't break us, even if they made this virus to weaken us. There are signs they are using the World Health Organization to cover up their shame. Things may be worse over there than they seem. Just ask Japan about their petition to remove the leader of WHO for propaganda campaign and misinformation that led to this messy nightmare we're in. Our great debt to China has been known for years. They had the last four years, since Trump bullied them, to reply. You think in an election year, it's the right time. I think they're scared of us. We'll call any bluff. Don't get worked up over one person's opinion. A conspiracy theory that is the stuff of fiction by someone wanting your attention is omitting a lot of other information to spin their own theory. I'm just basing it off your synopsis here. We have the ability as a free nation to collect information from many sources. Freedom of press. Yes, wealth rules the world. But, this is like a giant board game of Risk. Military is our strength. When we lose that, I'd worry. Until then, fire up the Keurig and binge watch any content you like. We are the Kings and Queens in the end. I would advise not to spread doomsday principals without giving balance to what you opine, because you would be no better than the Youtuber who scared himself with his own fiction. My advise, sleep with the light on, if it helps. I want to see that video. Could you link? Got to run now, cash in my investments Monday. Darn. I really wanted to buy Nike, Apple and Google stock, too. Got 10k burning a hole in my pocket. Capitalism. Am I right? Go figure. So, socialism was never a consideration? B |
| You might have been one of those people, who like me, questioned how our government can come up with a $2 trillion stimulus bill to help our nations economy. There is news now that this will more than double our deficit this year. “In 2013, when the country was still recovering from the Great Recession, (US Senator Mitch) McConnell told CBS News: ‘We now have a debt of $16.4 trillion. That's as big as our economy. That alone makes us look a lot like Greece. We have an incredible spending addiction.’” https://apple.news/AYT2FyPfSRtWozKofhpyuyA Meanwhile, the US stock market did surprisingly well today, despite reports of projected Coronavirus cases and deaths to come, and the impact on lives from having to stay home even longer. President Trump extended the stay at home order until the end of April. If you check that link there are additional stories about people extorting hospitals for money over a surplus of medical supplies. |
| Stay Clean— https://www.facebook.com/1175465270/posts/10219653531746919/?d=n You might get sick of hearing about the inevitable spread of the disease. Let's put in the perspective of a doctor in our area who shared today: "Humbling reality: The worse has not arrived yet. According to Professor Murray from the University of Washington, the peak of our local epidemic, ASSUMING WE CONTINUE WITH PHYSICAL DISTANCE MEASURES, will come on the third week of April. My friends, yes 3 more weeks....It seems by then we will have a statewide deficit of ICU beds. It will get really bad before it gets better. The good news: all this time, every hospital in our area has been taking measures to accommodate for the “surge” as best as we can. ...More somber news. The cases will not disappear overnight. We will be hearing of people passing away every week because of COVID 19 in our State well into summer, even if the epidemic is improving..." He adds, ”Our mortality (Northeast Wisconsin) is about 1.4%, a little bit better as compared to other areas. Having many patients very ill for a long time will impose a lot of stress on us, healthcare workers. Us in the healthcare field, we need to be prepared for busy months and we need to stay positive to develop resilience. Our community is here cheering for us 💚💛💚...” Just an FYI, since my wife and I have information coming from her hospital and caregivers we link to socially. Also, see NYTimes link for daily updates with country map of disease spread. You can see how bad it is especially in New York. https://www.nytimes.com/interactive/2020/us/coronavirus-us-cases.html |
| My doctor told me my glaucoma medication would make my eyes appear darker. Some recent photographs brought that evidence home to light. I've been taking this drug for well over ten years now. Since being post-op to save my eyes (going on thirty years), I've tried all kinds of meds to control the advance of the disease (my family is genetically predisposed). An additional prescription (for one eye only) I've been using for less time. Remarkably, it keeps my right eye blue. I've listened to my cousins from South Dakota say they don't put stock in eye drops to control intraocular pressure. It doesn't do anything to stop the advance of this disease, according to them. My wife, who works in medicine, told me not to stop. But, that extra pressure-controlling drop has me wondering: if I put it in my other eye, will it even out the color of my orbs? I could run it by my doc and wife, but I could also lean toward what my cousins believe. This is vanity talking. I feel sorry for that other, lazy eye. I look in the mirror, it's hard to distinguish. When I look at a digital pic, it's easy to spot an iris turning black with time. Once, when I ran out of drops, I told my eye specialist I supplemented with the additional drug for my lone eye, until a prescription could be filled. He said I made an appropriate choice, without reservation. What harm to just cut back on one medication and increase another, making sure I don't run out of either before refill? Time and these photographs remind me I have more unwanted changes to my appearance coming. However, I think of my mother who suffered through Parkinson's disease. Her family fell on hard times, back where my cousins are from. Mom had worn shoes that left her feet deformed as a child, curling the balls and toes upward. She and her sisters shared shoes. They had little money for new. When I was her kid, I kept massaging those calcified dogs, promising to work them out until they we're normal again. What childhood had taught her was the ability to smile with a frown. Parkinson's took away what little muscle she had left to pull up the corners of her mouth, when it was time for family photographs. We worked with her and coached her. She really wanted those pictures to turn out right. Maybe, it was a hard life she didn't want to be reminded of, seeing images of a bedraggled-looking woman. She had one artificial eye, lost to a staph infection when I was ten. Yet, she had an indomitable spirit that nothing could break. One day we got it right. We were shooting with film back then, so conserving. A picture of her with her enormous stuffed animal collection came out with a real smile and one wild eye. It was a keeper for mom. Maybe, it's vanity for me. Maybe, it's reminding me I'm okay, seeing that other blue eye emerge. I could photoshop. I confess, it is difficult to figure out and gave up on the app years ago. It wouldn't hurt to preserve something, if not my vision as I advance into a dark, unknowable future. Or, I could just recall the indomitable spirit of a woman whose strength taught me to never cry in her presence. |
View Portfolio
Visit Notebook
Send Gift Points
Awards
Badges
Send Email
Community Newsfeed
General Discussion
Sponsored Items
Book of Trinkets
Static Items
Books
Groups
Interactive Stories
Audio
Campfire Creatives
Community Notes
Crossword Puzzles
Documents
Folders
Images
In & Outs
Madlibs
Photo Albums
Polls
Product Reviews
Quizzes
Survey Forms
Web Pages
Word Searches
![Merit Badge in Rare
[Click For More Info]
I like your work!](https://images.Writing.Com/imgs/writing.com/writers/badges/general-Rare.gif)
