Noticing Newbies

Hello to all at Writing.com. I am the classic definition of a newbie, I just joined the site based on the hopes of getting my writing noticed and having a site to practice my writing on. I am neither young nor old, but have spend my life writing. Writing is more than a passion with me it is an actual addition with me.

Now most will read that have mixed feelings, the word "addition" its self tends to stir up mixed feelings to start with but when used with something like writing it usually saw to be a joke and seen in bad taste. Not in this case. Writing is my addition. Not one that I sought out like people do drugs nor is it one that I secretly hope to over come like smoking, but an addition none the less.

Indulged me for a few moments and I will try to explain, or at least sum up why I feel as though that is in fact an actuate protrail of writing and myself.

I will get these intense physical NEEDS to write. I won't even have anything on my mind at the time, but just need to write something/anything and it will begin to sort of poke at me; "Need to write" slowly growing until it becomes a physical thing. I will feel the pen between my fingers even though I have nothing in my hands, or will start feeling surfaces for writing areas not even notice it. If I ignore it or am unable to satisfy the inner hunger it will continue to grow and my mind will start running away with poems or stories generated by seeing random words or seeing random pictures without captions. If the hunger goes too long without being feed it will alter my mood and has been know to actually put me out.

Many of you are probably thinking just like my family and friends have, that it is a health thing. I have been tested for everything from an array of mental illnesses to sleeping disorders and everything in between. Nothing has ever been located to be wrong with me.

I am simply addicted writing. I use writing to cope with all areas of life, to document thoughts-dreams-options-tasks, you name it I use writing to for it. Now when these "events" (as my family use to call them) strike, it depends on the intensity as to what it craves. Sometimes just listing out what will/has been in the day is enough other times it is pages of stuff.

The pages are the big hungers, but the most beautiful to me. Like I said before I will not have a thought in my head I just know I need pen & paper. Once I have the supplies my fingers and mind seem to disconnect from the body and I can almost watch the hand gracefully float over the paper like watching a breath taking dance or something and oh the end results...wow. I have produced some of the best pieces of work not even realizing I was working on anything.

It is so natural to me though that it tends to come out in most of what I do. Letters to family and friends have been kept due to the poem like feel of the letters, even if they are getting scolded. They have actually told me that they like being scolded by me because it is like receiving a song writing just for them.

I have always written and would love nothing more in life than to discover a way to make money writing, yet to date I have nothing published and am not sure if I am even talented enough to ever be published. However, I will never give up on that dream.

So like I said before, I a newbie that just joined because this site looked like a site that could help me an addition that I neither want to quit or over come, but prefer to feed to the end of time.

So hello to all of you here.
I am RJ Koby