Under Construction - MHWA Retreat

Just letting off some steam...

As most of you know, I had a tooth extracted this month, and ended up with a fracture in my jaw. That wasn't fun. It also means that I can't go for an implant anytime soon, which means that I have to walk around with a gap between my teeth. Luckily, it's not really visible, but my self-esteem is already pretty much non-existent, so it doesn't help.

This weekend I babysat two kids. One's a six-year-old boy. He's clearly showing loads of Autistic traits, but his mom and stepdad don't seem to see it/are in denial. The other's a twelve-year-old girl who's got loads of horrible stuff going on in her mind. She hates humanity. She hates herself. She thinks people are terrible, destructive beings. She told me she'd kill people if she thought she could get away with it. And she'd make it slow and painful. She thinks she's a psychopath. I just think she's been hurt a lot. She told me how she's being bullied at school. Punched in the hallways etc. She's had some bad things happen to her. Her parents know, and they should be doing stuff, but they don't seem to?

An ex of mine's decided he wants to marry me. He actually seems to be serious.

With everything going on I haven't spoken with my family in a while. So my sister's sent me a real guilt-tripping letter.

I've been quiet all around. What with the toothache and all, I just didn't feel like socialising. Not even online. It makes me feel like a bad friend/bad person, but sometimes I can't help it.

And now I've got 48 hours to write an essay on whether or not Plato's Meno establishes that virtue can be taught. I have no solid answer to that, possibly because I have spent way too little time studying what with everything, and I am beginning to wonder if I am even cut out to be a post-graduate student. My score on my first essay about aesthetics was not what I had hoped for. Okay, I wrote it whilst I had a bad toothache, but still... And we're going into quantum mechanics next.

My head feels fried.