Slowly I sink into my haze. Things always seem clearer when I am here. Reality is distorted but simplicity is restored. I can be whatever I want without the pain of rejection fading in. In my place I can smile with the sunshine, chasing away the clouds. I am loved whole heartedly with adoration streaming proud and true. There is no pain or suffering. There are no harsh words that sting like the tails of a whip. Here I am everything to everyone. I breathe in the sweet air, filling my lungs when suddenly the bitterness of reality entwines its burning grasp into the depths of my soul and jerks me violently back. The world becomes cloudy as I can feel the pain searing my body. With each heartbeat the intensity increases. The touches become rough and demeaning. Eyes drill with burning accusations. I become nothing once again. Love becoming nothing but a faded memory. Reality wins. I am forever in pain.
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