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Speak out as a real man, an all woman woman or... |
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** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** This I&O lets you speak your mind as a man or a woman, regardless of your actual sex.... He said...She said  The invitation is to be sexist!A third choice is added to this battle of the sexes... It said Lets say an alien from another galaxy  can comment also. This alien is sexless (as we understand it). Has very different ways, but also is very logical (think Spockish here).The purpose of this third option is to introduce a dispassionate or alien viewpoint. Make a statement,write a poem,ask a question,get a story going... Can be funny,sarcastic,angry,honest,logical but always  play the role you chose for that entry as strongly or in as exaggerated a fashion for that sex as you can .For Instance... He: Honey,(scratches crotch) can you get me the remote off the table over there, I want to change the channel She: Oh,(yelling from kitchen) you mean after I wash the kids off, clean up the dinner dishes and run to the store - or did you want me to change my priorities? It: Why do you wash the kids off? No particular order, genders can repeat and you don't need to be the sex of your character (or an alien).  But you do need to write as that sex (or alien) .Hey, ya know...you say what you gotta say...  |
"It: Why do you people park in the driveway and drive in the parkway? Is it me?" "She: Do you remember what tomorrow is?" "She: I can't believe that you don't remember that tomorrow is the 2nd anniversary of the day before Barb set us up for our first blind date! You Bas***d !" " "He: (3:02 am) But sugarbutt, I came home to you. Come on sugar, give me some sugar *hic* She: (3:02 am) Ahh honey *smack, slaps his face* Sleep on the couch sugarbutt! IT: What is a Bubba???" "It: Special is not something my species understands. We were all created with absolute equality. But, we are superior to the human race. Are you trying to be superior?" "He: Yogi? Didn't he play for the Yankees way back in the 50's or 60's? Well it was a long time ago, anyway." "HE: 'Hic! Wish you'd make up your mind woman! One minute I drink too much .. hic! .. next you want me to be more of a sot .. And how did ya know my name was Eric?" "It: I find it intellectually stimulating to see who can say the most with the absolute least number of words. Do Earth females share that view? " "He: No matter how much she moves on with her life and says she's over me I know, I just know that she is still devastated and wants me back! She will never be able to live without me, can't do it, nope, never happen." "He:Yeah,she bought satin sheets.Satin Sheets!Ever try them?Your pillow will slide from under your head first.You actually can't stay on the bed.You'll find yourself on the floor in the morning!" "He: Golleee! Them thangs are strange. Do you thank they's got a mother ship somewhere? What are they doing now? 'At's a mite strange what they a doing now." "He: Maybe because they're not that good after all." "It: Where are the good men taken?" "It: I'm sensing a lot of hostility here. Particularly related to this special soup stirring stick." "He: Hehehehehe......." "He: Aww honeybutt, you don't need that there buzzin stick, you got me! She: I know I have you, that is precisely WHY I need this buzzin stick! It: It's all tingly :)" "He: "Say darlin, when's supper gonna be ready?" She: "As soon as you take yourself in the kitchen and cook it." It: "He's making hot dogs again isn't he?" She: "Yes!"" "He: "Hey baby, why don't you come on over here and gimme some sugar?" She: "Why don't you go take a shower and brush your teeth and I'll think about it sometime!" " "He: Women! You can't live with em and you can't live with em." "It: Am I mistaken or is that redundant?" "He: " We gotta stop at Home Depot on the way to Best Buy!" (while thinking OH BOY a day in heaven!)" "It:I am considering recommending to my home world that we eliminate one of your earth genders to stop this endless and chaotic dialog. I have not decided for sure yet..or which sex should go if that becomes the answer..." "He: Honey will you grab me a pack of cigs? He: Will you pack them? He: Will you open them for me? She: Do you want me to smoke the damn things too???" "He: "Oh baby you were really screaming my name while we were makin love tonight, I liked it" She: "Don't flatter yourself, my hair was caught in the headboard"" "She: "Why won't you cuddle anymore?" He: "Why do we always have to cuddle before you'll give it up?"" "It: "How do turn the oven on?" He: "We have an oven?" She: "Honey it's the thing I keep asking you to put your head in"" "She: Sweetie, would you grab that can off the top shelf for me? He: Get a chair. It: Go go gadget arm." "He: There's something amiss here. She: You mean me? It: You haven't been a "miss" since you married that no-good bum you call a husband. She: That doesn't sound very "Spockish"." "He: It has a sprocket loose. She: It has pockets? It: LOOSE! As in loser, which you married. He: Lose her? Bad advice, Spock. It: Ohhh, cheese and rice... I .. am .. not .. Spock!" "It: "Why must you always call me "IT"! I have a name you know and it aint spock!" " "He: "Well then what is your name little buddy?"" "It: "Now you ask, after all this time! After all we've been through!"" "HE: We have been through a lot, haven't we? Blood, guts, sweat, and tears. SHE: Oh, you make everything sound like a major battle. HE: Well isn't it? SHE: It's only an In&Out, not World War III." "It: "What is 'War'"?" "HE: It's the way civilized people settle their arguments. Might makes right. History is written by the victors." "It: "Who's Victor? I haven't met him yet."" "SHE: Victor? Mature? I think not!" "HE: More mature than your children. She: You mean the ones that I made by myself and apparently am raising by myself? It: You procreate singularly too?" "HE: I have to she's always gotta headache." "He: Well, I guess I'll go get my toolbox. She: I guess I'll call the plumber. It: I guess it's time for me to go home now..." "He:Damn, woman always trying to find new ways to spend money. I can fix the sink myself.
She:I should probably get the first aid kit, as well." "She:Why is the kitchen flooded? Honey? Where are you?
He: I'm under the sink, I think I found the problem
She: Me too, but all I see are his feet.
It: Your appliances don't fix themselves?" "He: Where's the remote? She(sarcastically): Did you check up your ass?" "It, excitedly: Finally, a similarity! I also have storage units in the area you humans call an 'ass.'" "He: (looks her up and down) "You're kind of snippy today. Is it that time of the month?"" "She: You mean the time of month I consider divorce.
He: Well, it's definitley the time when I consider it." "It: You also find new mates each month?" "She: "Only when I'm lucky"" ""He: Why do women always respond to problems by crying? She: Why do men always respond to problems by getting drunk? It: I always cry when I get drunk."" "He: You're all making me depressed! I'm headed to the bar for a beer!" Total Displayed: 50 |
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