Chapter #3You ain't never had a mon like me... by: Unknown "ASH KETCHUM!" Boomed a voice from the bush. Ash was cautiously walking toward the bush but it didn't matter, Ecchiluv had already jumped out mere inches from Ash's face.
"Ash Ketchum. I humbly request that you catch me in a pokéball" Ash was stunned. He had no idea who this strange humanoid figure was.
"I'm sorry, who are you?" Ash said with a questioning gaze.
"I'm the pokémon that's gonna grant all your sexual desires. Ashy boy."
Ash tried to question him but it was too late. Ecchiluv had already broken into song...
* * *
Master, I don't think you quite realize what you got here!
So, why don't you just ruminate,
While I illuminate the possibilities!
Well, Ash Ketchum had them rocket thieves,
Those trainers had a thousand tales.
But master you're in luck, 'cause in your pants
You've got a brand of magic never fails
You've got some power in your member now!
Some heavy ammunition in your balls!
You got some punch, pizzaz, yahoo and how.
See, all you gotta do is throw that ball, and I'll say:
"Mr. Ash Ketchum, sir, what will your pleasure be?
Let me take your order, jot it down?"
You ain't never had mon like me
Life is your strip club and I'm the manager
Come on whisper what it is you want;
You ain't never had mon like me!
Yes sir, we pride ourselves on service.
You're the leader, the champ, the master.
Say what you wish; it's yours, true dish.
How 'bout a little more sexy whore?
Have some of human girl try All of pokéchick,
I'm in the mood to help you, dude.
You ain't never had mon like me
Oh my. No no. My my my.
Can your mons do this?
Can your mons suck that?
Can your mons pull this
Out their little hat?
Can your mons go poof?
Well looky here.
Can your mons go abracadabra, let her rip,
And then make the sucker disappear?
So don't just sit there slack-jawed, buggy-eyed,
I'm here to answer all your mid-day prayers,
You've got me bona fide certified;
You've got a legendary for charge d'affaires.
I've got a powerful lust to help you out,
So what you wish, I really wanna know?
You've got a list that's three miles long, no doubt,
Well all you've gotta do is throw like so, and oh -
Mr. Ash Ketchum, sir, have a wish or two or three.
I'm on the job for your big knob!
You ain't never had a mon, never had a mon,
You ain't never had a mon, never had a mon,
You ain't never had a mon like me.
You ain't never had a mon like me.
* * *
"Wow." Said Ash, feeling dumbstruck but also kind of horny.
"Pikaaaa" Said Pikachu, feeling the same way.
"Well, Ash. Throw the ball already!" Said Ecchiluv, excited for the adventures coming in the future.
"Alright!" Ash took a pitching stance "Go, pokéball!" The ball hit Ecchiluv right on the nose.
"Hey!" He yelled at Ash "Watch where you're throwi-" With a beam of red light, he was sucked into ball before he could finish. The ball wobbled once. Twice. Three times. With an audible click, Ecchiluv had been caught.
* * *
Ash then pushed the release button on the ball, Ecchiluv's form materialising before his eyes.
"So, Ash Ketchum. What do you desire?"
"I want..."  indicates the next chapter needs to be written. |
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