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 Review #3626435 |
| (3.0)  Welcome to WDC from "Newbie Welcome Wagon" ! Title: Conflict Author: KittyKat  Type: Essay I can appreciate your concerns with the current state of humanity. I'm apparently much older than you and so I've seen a lot of changes, and not all of them good. But I guess that is the same with all generations, not that it helps knowing that. Your essay is very short, and I felt there was lots you left unexplored on the topic of conflicts. Also, it seemed to meander a bit, and although you got back to conflicting emotions at the end, I wasn't sure how the changing times pertained to the subject. While I understand your concern, be careful when stating absolutes, lines like, "but I feel different than the rest of the "children" in my high school." and people have grown small-minded. These aren't facts, they are opinions and should be labeled as such. Try using qualifiers like, "I think, my opinion" et cetera. I think it's good that you have a maturity beyond your years, and I am sure in the right moments, you still remember to be a kid too. I hope so, don't grow up too fast.  Don't let my suggestions above put you off, they are merely my opinions, other readers might see it differently. I did enjoy your essay and hope you write more and expand on it. I also want to welcome you to Writing.com and hope your stay here is a long one. ** Image ID #1787883 Unavailable **
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