Hello steviekey. How are you doing? My name's Charlie and I'm here to welcome you to WDC with a review of your poem, "Invalid Item" . Thanks for sharing your work with us. Let me know if you need any help around the site.

Ah, unrequited love, huh? I think it's hard to watch someone you care about be with someone who doesn't care about them as much as you do. Of course, there are a million questions to be asked, like whether or not you really care about the person more than the other person does. That's always up for debate, I suppose. It sounds like the narrator in this poem might be the "other" person in someone else's relationship. Perhaps a side slice to another couple. Love is complicated. We find ourselves in these situations. Maybe the narrator has a side slice in his relationship, who is this other guy. Who knows.

I thought the rhyming pattern was a little off at times in this poem. It definitely threw the flow off on occasion. For example, in the second stanza where "worthy" was rhymed with "pretty". Or the final stanza where there's a beat or two too many in the final line. I think if you read this out loud, you'll be able to pick up those parts that don't flow smoothly together.

Even with that, my favorite stanza was the final one. I thought the sentiment and emotion there was interesting and relatable. It's sad to see how much the narrator is willing to do for this person who may not even appreciate it in the end, but such is love.

Anyway, thanks again for sharing your poem with us. It was a good read.



My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .