\"Writing.Com
*Magnify*
◄     December     ►
1969
SMTWTFS
 
1
2
3
4
5
6
7
8
9
10
11
12
13
14
15
16
17
18
19
20
21
22
23
24
25
26
27
28
29
30
31
Archive RSS
SPONSORED LINKS
BY ONLINE AUTHORS
Printed from https://shop.writing.com/main/my_feedback/action/view/id/4738958
Review #4738958
Viewing a review of:
Image Protector
ruwth is writing... Open in new Window. [18+]
I will be adding stories & reflections as time marches on. Take a gander today!
by ruwth Author Icon
         Review for entry/chapter: "~ Sky Diving ~" Open in new Window.
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  Open in new Window.
Rated: 18+ | (4.5)
Access:  Public | Hide Review (?)
Greetings!

Ah, this was really good. I quite enjoyed reading it, though I was half expecting it to include the actual moment of the sky dive. But there’s a word limit, and the point is to highlight the three perspectives in a memorable way.

You handled it perfectly, with the three main characters each having a distinct and unique voice that shines in the allotted moments. The order of POVs is arranged well, beginning with your own sense of unease and panic and ending on an amusing note with the pilot’s view of how absurd you and the entire situation must have appeared to him. The details mesh perfectly as well; from person to person it all matches up and fills in the picture.

Your formatting is good, with font size larger than default and easy to read. I noticed two super minor typos: “Yeh, This place…” in the granddaughter’s dialogue has a capitalization error, and the word “hangers” in your dialogue should be “hangars,” for planes. Other than that, I think it’s a winner *Clap*

If you need sectional word counts, you can access them on your Word file by selecting the desired text chunk (you know: select, copy, paste…) and then checking the word count; it will break down the count and include the portion you’ve selected.

Thanks for sharing, take care and keep writing *Smile* *HeartT*


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Open in new Window..
   *NoteR* You have not yet responded to this review. Ignore
Printed from https://shop.writing.com/main/my_feedback/action/view/id/4738958