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 Review #4750315 |
   |  | ruwth is writing...  [18+] I will be adding stories & reflections as time marches on. Take a gander today!  |
| (4.5)   Greetings, ruwth! I am reviewing this because I am part of "I Write in 2024" and your entry was the last one posted.  First of all, my reviews are intended to be helpful and encouraging, not hurtful in any way. Use what you feel works for you, and leave the rest. The Positives/What I Liked I noticed right off that you have entered Hook of the Book! What a fun contest, yes? Your presentation looked very nice with the image, the font you used, and the first few lines felt very intimate.   My favorite part was when your chair began to shift in the sand. That immediately peeked my interest! Suggestions/Comments to ConsiderDon't get me wrong, I like what you've written so far, but I'd like you to ask yourself something: If you read the first few sentences of a book, would this hook you right away? If the answer is yes, completely disregard this section of this review. Otherwise, read on... Everything you've written is fine, but you might want to consider making it just a hair more intriguing. Perhaps begin it with the chair shifting. Grab that reader right off and give them a reason to keep on reading. It's entirely up to you, of course! Just a thought. Final ThoughtsBest of luck in the contest, Ruwth! Have a great day and... K e e p on W r i t i n g ! Cubby ")
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