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Comedy: August 12, 2009 Issue [#3208]

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Comedy


 This week:
  Edited by: Sophurky Author IconMail Icon
                             More Newsletters By This Editor  Open in new Window.

Table of Contents

1. About this Newsletter
2. A Word from our Sponsor
3. Letter from the Editor
4. Editor's Picks
5. A Word from Writing.Com
6. Ask & Answer
7. Removal instructions

About This Newsletter

Summer vacation was over and Little Johnny returned back to school.

Only two days later his teacher phoned his mother to tell her that he was misbehaving.

"Wait a minute," she said. "I had Johnny with me for three months and I never called you once when he misbehaved!"


*Laugh*

Hi, I'm Sophurky Author Icon ~ your editor for this edition of the Comedy Newsletter. This week we'll talk about going back to school.


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Letter from the editor

The "Back to School" Issue

Is it just me, or is summer getting shorter? Where I live in the US, kids are going back to school next week and I could have sworn they just got out of school a few weeks ago. Didn't they? Or am I just getting old? (Don't answer that, it was a rhetorical question.) *Laugh* And now that I think about it, how can summer be getting shorter when the days are actually longer in the summer -- is it some sort of optical illusion? Or am I just losing my mind? (Again, rhetorical question, no need to answer.)

I do think summer vacations have actually gotten shorter and it's not just me losing track of time or my mind, lol -- where I grew up in Southern California, we got a full three months off -- all of June, July, and August -- usually out of school just before Memorial Day and then didn't go back until after Labor Day. But where I live now in Illinois they still get out around Memorial Day and are back three weeks before Labor Day, and I can't help but feel sorry for the little darlings (though I know many parents are thrilled to have them back in school, probably feeling like summer lasted forever). And I feel bad for my many friends who are teachers and therefore have to return to work. But I don't feel that bad for them, since most of us don't get the whole summer off work for our jobs. *Wink*

Back on point, as I said earlier, I think the only people happy about school starting up again are parents. I know they love their little snuggle-muffins, but I'm sure many of them feel like it's probably way past time to send them away again for several hours a day. I mean, no matter how much you love the little dickens, how many times a day can anyone be expected to hear "I'm bored" come whining out of their mouths? Sure, there may be a few students that are excited and happy about going back to school -- you know the type, the geeky teacher's pets who love to learn and study and be in school, right? Yeah, the little bookworm nerds we all went to school with who actually enjoyed school. But other than those weirdos, it's the parents who are looking most forward to the first day of school.

<hangs head in shame>

Okay, fine, I have a confession to make. I was one of those geeky, nerdy, weirdos who LOVED the start of the new school year. Don't get me wrong, I enjoyed summer vacation as much as anyone, but I also loved going back to school and everything that went with it. For instance, I loved buying new school supplies, all fresh and clean and ready to help me learn important things, which I would quickly forget over the summer. I loved the feel of a fresh new package of lined notebook paper in my brand new Partridge Family notebook, even though I knew they wouldn't stay that way. And I loved the smell of a new box of pencils, especially the erasers, and how clean and shiny my lunchbox was those first few days of school, before it got dirty and began to smell like spoiled milk and bananas. You know that smell, right? Ah, the good old days.

What about you? Did you look forward to the start of a new school year, or were you too busy mourning the loss of another summer to enjoy going back to school? Why not write about it, if you are looking for something funny to share. Lots of good "back to school" material rattling around in our brains -- we should probably write it all down before we get so old we forget it all!

Sophurky Author Icon


Editor's Picks

Below you'll find some offerings from other WDC members about going back to school (or school in general):

First -- a fun "back to school" contest:
 Invalid Item Open in new Window.
This item number is not valid.
#1460918 by Not Available.


Do home-schooled kids get a summer vacation? *Wink*
 Home School Open in new Window. (13+)
Historical figures really come to life at home school!
#1588855 by InkWellspring66 Author IconMail Icon


A fun one about a proposal for a new school club:
 Zombie Awareness: A Formal Letter Open in new Window. (E)
A mock letter I gave to my principal saying we need a zombie survival club at the school.
#1579080 by V.L. Dirge Author IconMail Icon


And then a few other items relating to school, students and/or their poor teachers:
 Back to School: Masters Degree Open in new Window. (E)
I finally finished getting my master’s degree in 2007
#1590385 by Prosperous Snow celebrating Author IconMail Icon

 The Crayon Box Open in new Window. (E)
A humorous personal essay about never losing the child within.
#903116 by truebeliever Author IconMail Icon

 Invalid Item Open in new Window.
This item number is not valid.
#877824 by Not Available.

 Lament for My Missing Cottage Cheese Open in new Window. (E)
A glimpse into the life of a high school teacher
#1537862 by Ms. J Author IconMail Icon

 Invalid Item Open in new Window.
This item number is not valid.
#1587939 by Not Available.

The Story of "Is" Open in new Window. (E)
A teacher's insane attempt to get her students to see what part of speech is is.
#1446096 by audra_branson Author IconMail Icon

How To Teach Open in new Window. (E)
satire aimed at teachers and students alike
#1369958 by respeitoOte Author IconMail Icon


 
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Ask & Answer

Now for a few comments about my last newsletter about the joy of exercise:

From Kristina Author Icon
It is so sad we are number 24! How the heck??? I love the highlighted pieces on this weeks newsletter. Thanks for sharing this enlightening information! I am heading to the gym...


So .... how's the gym thing going? *Wink*

*Flower1* *Flower2* *Flower3* *Flower4* *Flower5* *Flower6*

From spidey Author Icon
*Laugh* Great newsletter! Thankfully my husband keeps me laughing (and burning those calories)!


Mine too -- I'm hoping that the more mine makes me laugh, the less time for me at the gym! *Bigsmile*

*Flower1* *Flower2* *Flower3* *Flower4* *Flower5* *Flower6*

From shaara
This was a great newsletter, Sophy. I especially liked the opening joke. Where can I find those potato sacks? FOFL (Burning calories laughing!)

By the way, don't typing fingers burn off calories? How many I wonder? And if they're laughing, typing fingers . . . ?

Shaara

P.S. I am not babysitting those babies! Talk about hyper-active! LOL


I am sure typing burns a few calories -- excellent point -- and laughing while typing, well, that's gotta be even better. Thanks for that brilliant insight. And yeah, those babies, wow! *Laugh*

*Flower1* *Flower2* *Flower3* *Flower4* *Flower5* *Flower6*

From faithjourney
Look on the bright side - we Americans are fortunate to be well off enough that we can afford to overeat and sit on our fat behinds all day.

On the other hand, getting on the treadmill does make me feel better, keeps the scale from saying "tilt" when I get on it twice a year, and gets my doctor to quit nagging me. Every now and then I even have a great writing idea, when I'm not wondering how killing myself on that machine is supposed to help me live longer.

But now you've got me thinking of this awesome fish and chip place we used to have around here when I was a kid. Mmm, fish and chips. Yummy.


Good point about treadmill walking giving you good writing ideas sometimes -- I try to think of ideas when I swim, but then I lose count of my laps so that doesn't work for me, lol.

*Flower1* *Flower2* *Flower3* *Flower4* *Flower5* *Flower6*

From Ẃeβ࿚ẂỉԎḈĥ Author Icon
Great Newsletter on exercise, or the lack thereof, Sophy! I have recently started playing golf. Finding those balls in the shrubbery is real exercise! Of course, poison ivy is one of the hazzards of this type of exercise. Hmmmm, I guess I'll have to try the old, reliable, sit at your desk favorite exercise of all time--tossing a crumpled paper into the wastebasket! Now, that's more like it!

*Wink*
WW


Mark Twain said, and I agree, that "Golf is a good walk spoiled."

Can you tell I'm married to a golfer? 'Nuff said. *Laugh*

*Flower1* *Flower2* *Flower3* *Flower4* *Flower5* *Flower6*

From Coolhand Author Icon
Sophy, great stuff about sitting at the computer and exercise. That list was also enlightening. I try to take a walk every day.


Good for you -- walking is actually very good for us, and is one of the easiest things to do.

*Flower1* *Flower2* *Flower3* *Flower4* *Flower5* *Flower6*

That's all for this month -- see you next time! And on behalf of the other regular Comedy Newsletter Editors, Robert Waltz Author Icon and Ẃeβ࿚ẂỉԎḈĥ Author Icon remember to WRITE AND LAUGH ON! *Bigsmile*
Sophurky Author Icon

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